problems just seem to worsen each time

back from Hong Kong

2007-12-19T11:32:00.000+08:00

teddy bear kingdom closed down long ago n luckily i din go. if not it will b a wasted trip. went lady's street, temple street couple of times. bought this bought that. went loads of places like causeway bay, wong tai sin, central, sheung wan, tsim sha tsui, east tsim sha tsui, sha tin, mong kok, jordon, disney blar blar. ate food in cha can ting, dim sum and so on. food there is okay. but eating in their restaurants or places like cha can ting is more expensive as compared to if u buy buns and biscuits. spoke loads of bu zhun canto there. bought a bottle vodka there n it cost 2 sing dollars, wad i mean is those breezer bottle. cheap like shit. here one bottle islike 4-7 bucks. i can buy 2 bottles there. bought absolut vodka raspberry flavour in singapore's duty-free zone. n is only 25 dollars. outside sell 78 bucks. its almost 4 times more. tis is crazy.

Hong Kong

2007-11-03T18:02:00.001+08:00

YAY! i m gng to hong kong in dec. i m gng to TEDDY BEAR KINGDOM!!!!! de one juz like goong!!! haha. perhaps de lousy hong kong disney too. but most of all de nv ren jie (lady's street) can SHA JIA and buy wad i like!!! planning to hunt for cheap PSP and camera dere (*keeping my fingers cross*) wondering wad to get fer ***. But i hope the trip wuld come sooner. MAI DONG XI CHI DONG XI!!!!!

but still dreading at monday's OP =( sad sia. hate tis stoopid PW. waste my time.

2007-03-05T16:13:00.000+08:00

wyn, jas n fai

wen, jas and fai

my dear "BUTTIES"

thx gals fer de wonderful bday at de Olio plus all de 17 presents u all gav. ai si ni men! :)

to dat special person: thanx fer tad evening althou its abit rush but i'll neva ferget it. lub you.

FYI: tad guy abv is not my bf!

2006-12-09T18:16:00.000+08:00

its been so long n its nearin christmas le. wonderin wad wuld dat day b lyk. will it juz b lyk any other day? or will it be a special one?

so many days past le. yet still no temp job. idling at home doin absolutely nth makes me feel tad i m juz wasting my lyfe away. i m so freakin bored. shld i juz go wif my family to shanghai? but i realie hate CHINA. i dunno y.

2006-11-13T18:42:00.000+08:00

if the last ting i culd do in this world is to forget u n wad we went thru together then, i wuld never do it even if i haf to die a million times.

3 more days marks the end of my secondary muggin years.. neva tot tad this day wuld come so quickly.. it seems too unbelievable.. n for a moment i felt sian n wishd tad everyting will start again.. but i realise sometings r juz not meant to be rackd up frm da past.. we will b gng on our separate ways n perhaps wuld neva get to meet for de rest of our lives. its a rather sad ting. hai.
well tis onlie meant for friends. i will be all de more HAPPY not see da one i hate!

==================================
i m serious getting fed up wif all da stoopid tings happening. when will all dese stoopid nonsensical stuff cease to happen. dey juz ****d up my life. i mean all tings r veh simple yet some stoopid brainless ppl juz makes tings more complex. i juz feel lyk stepping all over de brains of dese ppl. cuz i noe tad dere is nth but tissues/cells in dem, no logic n no sense of responsibility etc. de ppl tad i hate most is dose shit ppl who forget de promises de made. dese ppl r de worst of all!

2006-10-31T16:52:00.000+08:00

today's chem prac is lyk shit. my thinking qn is totally wrong. how? i dunno. so i wuld haf to buck up on my theory paper. both physics n chem. woah tis is so damn stressful lar. i dunno how m i gng to cope wif all tis stress coming frm studies n elsewhere. hai~ i dunno!! also i tink my chinese paper oneis gng to suck so much cuz i dunno wad i dng. hai~ i reallie dunno how to actually feel relief when all tis stupid tings juz ****ed up my life. hai!

today, i still dun feel lyk toking to tad idiot. but bo bian i dun wana lyk make de current situation any worse. now tad dere is tis tension. but i din really crap wif tis idiot lyk how i used to. haha. but we toked. mostly on chem today. but i really dun feel lyk toking to tad idiot animore. its juz so sucky. hai~

to SLACK ZEED:
bloody slack zeed i wana CONDEMN u cuz u disregard our request to consult u!!! we asked u bloody last week!!!! n wad timing we get??? tml THREE pm. wth. i mean we asked u so long ago n u sae ppl alr booked u wif timeslots earlier than us. i mean how can u do tis. tis is so freakin unfair!!! argggg. i reallie tot of kicking u in de butt. haha.

如果时间倒流那我不会在走着一条路
也不会做出一个残忍的决定
让那个人为我做出的决定伤心难过
但是时间不能挽回
所以我不会对我在过去做出的抉择感到后悔.

2006-10-30T17:55:00.000+08:00

i juz dun understand y we ppl r so dumb. 为什么我们要去等待一个不爱自己的人而没去珍惜过爱自己的人. i duno y. althou we noe tad dere is a hole in frnt of us, one big n deep hole. but we choose to walk into de hole wich cuz us to be depressed n unhappy. at de end we realise tad its hard to get out of the bloody hole. i felt so stupid. i mean y carn i juz doa roundabout the bloody hole instead of walking into it. tis is so dumb. haha. i took lyk so long to finally get out of it. it wasnt easy. at least he din make it easy for me to do so. when i was numerous times gng to climb out of the hole, he juz did sum stupid ting wich let me fall back in. i waited so freaking long. yet wad do i get in return? juz his coldness and hurting words. lol. duz tis call " i reap wad i sow?" i felt so freakin dumb, wasting all my precious time on such a heartless and cold person whom i knew not when i 1st noe him. dere's so many times i feel tad i shldnt haf startd tis. i was de dumb one.

Aint dere aniwae to let tings go. y do tings seem to get more n more complicated. i juz hate all tis wich are happening. y do i hav to always be de middleman. i m sick of it.

firstly to you who caused everyting to happen. u hav no mind of ur own. if u had listen to us long long time ago u wuld haf noe tad wad we told u is true. yet all de time u juz treat our words like some trash n throw it into de bin when u finished listening. do u noe u juz cause ppl frenship to be on the verge of breaking. all u juz did was to make de bloody situation worse. i mean carn u see tad u r de one causing all tis to happen. yet u pretended tad nth happen n fool around. i had enuf of tis. i juz hate u for being u. now i dun even wana tok crap wif u. cuz i felt i m wasting my precious time on u. i wasted so so much of my time. i felt so pissed of by joking around wif u now. i m considering nt to go to da bloody institute u ask me to go for de 1st 3 mths. cuz u r gng too. i had enuf of ur crap n u.

2ndly, to u whom i met on friday. dun brood over it animore. juz let tings go. i tink u shld haf taken my advice to giv u n ES a chance instead of wasting time on some stupid fool like him. n dun eat so much icecream nxt time if nt u r reallie gng to lao sai n vomit. oh. n dun waste ur tears on tad idiot animore. now tad he is nt worth ur feelings. n i realise u r nt afraid of person A, u r juz afraid tad tad idiot wuld tell u sumting tad u dun wana hear. juz face up to wad ever u hav to. tings will juz get better. God wont make u go thru wad u carn go thru. u noe it very well. n pls stop jking around wif da rumour tingy. it is causing some inconvenience here for me.

3rdly, to u hu i tok to on da fone. hey, dun tink so much. let tings go de way it shld. i mean dere is nth tad we culd do to it. besides we r de outsider. we r not suppose to intervene wif deir stuff. perhaps juz let dem solve de problems demselves. i felt so tired trying to help. haha. i learnt tad not all tings r in ur reach. so might as well juz let tings fall into deir places. tings will get better.

2006-10-25T19:16:00.000+08:00

i told my heart out todae. all de feelings i had for tad dumb shit to sw. cuz i wan her to see tad no matter makin ani decision will end it all( at least for me). it will ruin either fwenship or relationship. i lost both. wad a joke. haha. but in de end nth but misery n some idiotic crumped up feeling in me.

i dunno hu i m now. felt so **** up. pretending to be alrite n all dose shit. i m not alrite. not at all.

lol. felt so lost after all dose happening. i lost my way home.

2006-09-20T15:26:00.000+08:00

tings hav become more n more complicated. no words can describe my feelings now. i m so so tired of everyting happen. seriously i see no point in wad i m doing at da moment or even da past months, years???

i seriously dunno wad's happening in my lyfe. i din wana care animore.

its seems lyk tings juz screwed up in my bloody lyfe. i juz hope my results for da prelims will be good. or good enuf to go meridian. i m so so shagged abt everyting. i juz wish i din nid to go thru all tis shit tings in my lyfe. sian.

EXAM!!!

2006-09-13T18:34:00.000+08:00

prelims are here le. i m so screwd. realie screwd. my emaths,ss,egeog,amaths paper 1 for eng n chi paper 2 eng. practically all. ALL. i m so dead!

i m not prepared! at all.

2006-08-29T17:53:00.000+08:00

this is our CLASS VIDEO!!! omg r damn diao. althou abit blur online. but well its all sam dey all's work. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3216410408768412991&hl=en

haha. well we r into our teachers' day performance. today saw da 4DL's dance. its lyk damn cool esp terrence. his dancing damn damn diao lyk professional. haha. but ryunkiat dance lyk SHE's bosimao when his hands were pointing at da sides. haha. sumone frm my class tings ryunkiat is cute. n takes him as her eye candy. lol. ya he is cute when he is in sec 1 n 2. not now cuz nw he has GROWN UP! haha. his two other gay partner are still as gay as ever. lol. Bryan and derek. haha. so i tink kiat mature de most. by looking. haha.

yay. i hav yu gou jay's CD. yay!!! da poster of his is so freakin cool i love da foto of him, da 2nd frm da left. he lookd so shuai. damn derek's sister hu got his signature. hai~ haha but DEREK oso dun haf. i was larfing at him when he told me. haha. as ass boy still tinks he is JAY CHOU! lol. i told him: "pls la. dun be bhb. u carn make it. n pls stop wanting to spoil my poster by wanting to SIGN on it." lol. he is super duper bhb when it comes to Jay Chou. haha. neva fail to do tad to xia suay himself. haha.

today's chinese n eng paper 1 sucks. i dunno wad i riteing i tink i m gng to do so badly. i realie hope to get into MJC. or else i realie hav to settle for poly. i hope i do well fer da prelims. i dun wan to be a disappointment again. i dun wan to repeat wad i went tru fer da chinese. i seriously carn take it animore. hai~ but i guess i m gng to owing to my laziness n slackiness fer da pass months n years. hai~

2006-08-22T17:08:00.000+08:00

nothing meant tad same animore. tings change drastically before u even notice tings happening. nothing is tad same animore.

take me to your heart lyrics

Hiding from the rain and snow
Trying to forget but I won't let go
Looking at a crowded street
Listening to my own heart beat

So many people all around the world
Tell me where do I find someone like you girl

[Chorus]
Take me to your heart take me to your soul
Give me your hand before I'm old
Show me what love is - haven't got a clue
Show me that wonders can be true

They say nothing lasts forever
We're only here today
Love is now or never
Bring me far away

Take me to your heart take me to your soul
Give me your hand and hold me
Show me what love is - be my guiding star
It's easy take me to your heart

Standing on a mountain high
Looking at the moon through a clear blue sky
I should go and see some friends
But they don't really comprehend

Don't need too much talking without saying anything
All I need is someone who makes me wanna sing

[Chorus]

AGAIN

2006-08-19T16:29:00.000+08:00

all dese week passed so quickly before i realized it. da prelims are nearing n alots of tings had happen.

i got a B3 for my damn chinese. wad i predicted came true. b4 i even got da bloody results i alr had da intuition. my frens assured me dey sae i wont get a b3. in de end? wad happen. i saw da smiles on kenneth,karen, yuxin, daryl and shann's face. me? i duno. i walkd towards mdm kee. she was smiling. she told me tad she is disappointed in me. n sae i wuld be damn disappointed in myself. den she showd me da results. b3 and a merit for oral. so was tad smile on her face meant to be mocking at me? i duno. da results was devastating. i carn accept it even thou i got mentally prepared. i turn to wyn. i cried. i realie needed a shoulder n she was dere at tad moment. she was dere. i heard ppl askin for my result. i din wana speak. not a single word. i juz cried. i din wana let da rest see me crying. i went to da toilet. i came back n kwek comforted me. but i needed peace i told him to leave me alone. before i culd enjoy da peace. hu ever tad damn teacher was calld ppl to assemble. i sat dwn tinking on my results. shann comforted me made me smile wif his stoopid jokes. i sincerely thankd him for tad. amos sat on my left, derek sat on my right. rek askd me not to be so sad. but how culd i be happie at tis pt of time? how? amos askd me to zhen zuo. i will but not at tad pt of time. cuz i culd get up. not at all. dey dismissed us. n dose in my class hu went back to class were dose hu din had de appetite to eat except wyn hu pei me. we all were disappointd. syy, ys, rek, lion, me and wyn. we din speak. choonkuat came back wanting to ask for our results but knew someting was rong frm da mood of ours n kept quiet. me, wyn, sw n jas were at our seats. all of a sudden da feeling juz erupt in me. i rushd to da toilet. i cried again. i felt dat i was so crybaby at ta time. but i culdnt help it. i realie carn. sw, jas n wyn came to da toilet. i was glad i hav all my fwens. reallie.

tings now worsen cuz tings are getting more complicated. i reallie dun hav da courage to face all tis again. not alone. i dun hav da courage. when i saw all dose tings happening. i felt da my world juz broke dwn. y carn 1JSR2 understand? dusnt 1JSR2 noes aft all dese times? din 1JSR2 noe how i feel when 1JSR2 did all dose tings? i reallie duno wad 1JSR2 is tinking. AT ALL. i wishd i wuld noe den i wuld not be in tis miserable and bloody idiotic state now.

2006-08-03T17:10:00.000+08:00

Ytd was wenjie's bdae we actualli wanted to celebrate his bdae in Macs... haha... bt he suddenly broke out into cold sweat den carn go... he was damn damn weak n sick... so he went hm wif wyn n syy hu accompanied him... so we still went... bt we celebrated amos n JT's bdae... so hai~ aniway... actualli i din wanted to go alr cuz kwek is sick... bt in de end still went... den da macs ppl hav some dumb games prepared for us... lol... lyk building da highest castle wif plastic cups??? lol... i find it abit... erm... childish... lol... bt it was meant to be lyk tad... hai~ so me n jerrick(jasmine) eat liaoz den we zao... cuz its nearing 5... hai~ someone bangseh us... cuz tad person zhong se qin you... cuz tad person's crush din leave so tad person nva go hm wif us... fine lo... so me n jerrick went to da bus stop... hai~ den take bus hm... sian reach hm alr 5.45... yup..

todae during CME lsn... we playd a game lyk sim city... so dumb... my score was 443000... sian... so many guys gt lyk 500000+++ hai~ bt aniwae... it was damn dumb... had eng n emaths wif was freakin boring... n den aft recess was solid hair's lsn n den bloody E.T's lsn... den solid hair made us stay back for physics remedial on specific heat capacity n latent heat... sian sia... den aft tad me jerrick n sw waited for amos,JT and rek to go home... yup... den da guys were playing base ball in class... bt its da reallie SOFT kind.. lol... derek is damn damn lousy... he carn catch neither can he hit da ball.. lol... amos is one of da best among jt,derek and dong bin.. lol... aft playing a while somehow deir baseball bat went ko yak... spoilt.. i larfed... omg... its lyk having a a broken joint in da bat... lol... haha... den we walkd out together... n saw ppl playing interclass netball... lol.. yup.. wyn din hav da chance to see her prince charming.. lol.. both sia... summore playing same position but diff team... Joey and Ee Ruey playing Center... lol... den colin was da GA... haha... den we walkd out sw askd us whether want to eat den me n jerrick dunwan... i tink she wana go cuz she tink he is gng... but in de end she see him nt gng den she oso dun wan to go... den de other 2 guys went to eat lo... den jerrick n i said if she wan to eat y nt eat wif da 2 guys??? den she sae she dun wan... den we said i tot u wana eat?? go n eat arh... den she bu shuang wif us n diao us!!! lol...

juz cuz ur crush is nt gng den u dun go??? wad de... u r de one hu wana eat nt us... den c ur crush nva go den u dun go... we hao xin ask u go n eat cuz u sae u wan to... den u diao us??? lol... wad's tis man???

den da 3 of us went up 135... den we tkod abt lake house, late house and leg house... lol... so idiotic of us... haha... den jerrick went dwn... den da two of us were standing... cuz no one went dwn... so fustrating... haha... den we smell durian... lol... den he sae tis durian is damn expensive... cuz it cost $1000... lol... stoopid guy wif stoopid tinking... lol...

imconfused.idunowad2donw.iwishhedindidtad2me.cuziwillonliefeelworse. perhapshedinnoticetadsy.idunohwmigng2gtawayfrmtis.seriouslyiduno. dafeelinisgettinworseeachneveryday.imtrappd.iwishdtadalltisdinhappen. deniwonthavtogetintotismessagain.whenwillitevastop.whenwilldapainallstop?

2006-08-01T19:37:00.000+08:00

wah sian... so fast gona prelim liaoz... not enuf time... arh... aiming to go MJC using prelim results... cuz i realize poly isnt tad gd aft all... so... hai~

manie tings happen so suddenly... din even hav da time to do some mental preparation... felt so helpless... hai~ wondering wad's gona happen nxt bt somehow reality dusnt tally wif my prediction... m i so going to accept fate??? is tis wad life is all abt??? accepting fate??? bt wad else can i do besides tad??? haha... nth??? wad a crappy ting life can be... hai~

aniwae tml is wenjie bdae n we gona celebrate it in MACs.. can u believe it??? lol... n on 060806 its amos bdae... july n march are days when i m gonna b broke... hai~ i still wana save money to watch jay concert(if dere is one tis yr) arh... if i hav not enuf... i m so in big trouble... hai~
sometimes tings r juz gng da other wae.. hw i wish dey wont.. i noe dese tings wuld n nva gng to return..

2006-07-25T18:03:00.000+08:00

some idiotic person hu claims to be my BEST FRIEND hasnt reveal his or her identity... it seriously pissed me off... hai~ i wish tis person juz tell me hu he or she is... at least i noe hu rite... i dun haf to guess... n hw he or she noes abt "my past"... actuallie i hav narrowed dwn to some ppl... i juz wana cnf my guessing...

to YOUR BEST FRIEND: so hu eva u r... pls... juz tell me... if u dun wan to tag... den at least sms me or sumting... i realie wana noe hu r u... so pls... pls...

haha... recently lots of tings hav change for me... tings aint da same animore.. is tis a gd change or a bad one... i dunno... n i dun wish to noe... hai~ dese days i tink i hav become more n more negative.. is tis reallie me?? somehow aft da hk trip i could never find da me tad i was in sec 1 or 2... i m not me animore... kwek told me we are alike... n so is dada tan... hai~ r we so gonna sacrifice every freaking single time??? actuallie i do nt fit tis ting... at least i dun tink i m...

today jerrick aka jasmine finalie got his number... she was so high... lol... crazy all the way... well... tml sw n wyn dey all wana ask me out cuz tad's de onlie day wyn is free... i dun wish to go... moreover i m broke... no money... cuz i m saving money to go watch JAY CHOU concert wif derek, jas n wyn if dere is one... haha... it all started wif da stoopid guy... he suddenlie draw da concert tix tingy in chinese lsn... haha... so idiotic... den he ask me if i wana go... lol... for once i tot he was being serious n in de end... u noe wad.. he said "haha... u reallie tot got tis arh???" den he start to larf stoopidly... idiotic guy... den he cont" okay... if dere is realli one den we go..." lol... siao sia... den he ask wyn... den we told jas abt tis... haha... she also tot dere is tis ting... haha... c i m not da stoopid one okay derek sim!!!! yup... so me n jas sae to save 2 bucks each day to go watch jay's concert... we will be sitting at the $100 seat!!! haha... YAY!!! i m so freakin excited abt his concert...

ytd me, qin, sw n rek walk out together... cuz amos, syy, DB, JT, SK n four dragon were in frnt... wow silong can reallie "fly" haha... so... me n rek went to chase dem while qin n sw walk slowly... haha... den yk n jo also walking out... haha... den we ova take dem... stoopid yk... sae some reallie stoopid tings when he sae me n rek walkin 2gether.. he said" oi!!! jian fu ying fu" freak him... i din wana turn one... bt in de end me n rek turn... den guess wad he sae" wow.. ni men hen man leh... san miao zhong hou cai zhuan..." he is damn freakin lame n gay!!! den jo ask me" where is suwen?" den i sae" at the back wif qin" den jo said" eh... ta mei you gen derek yi qi zou meh??" haha... at tad pt i wanted to larf out loud... bt i din cuz derek is nt suppose to noe sumtings... haha... yup... so we cont to chase da gang in frnt... haha... den i saw st,jl n jane... haha... den i call sheeting's name n hid behind syy... haha... so farnie... i was looking at deir reaction... den da stoopid amos say: wow u roll here arh???" feel lyk killing him sia... tad syy oso... my klass are filled wif idiotic guys... haha... den da stoopid syy playd da tapping game... wth... hai~ how lame can he gt??? i dunno...

den we boarded 135... den i sat on the 2nd last row on the right of the bus... amos n jt behind me... den stoopid derek sim came n sit beside me... i tot he will sit wif er hmm... but... he is damn idiotic enuf to not notice such obvious clue... but ya.. mayb he noes le... juz dun wana sae... aniwae... cont wif da bus story... haha... got one guy frm tad sch for de low IQ ppl near our sch.. he sat on de left 2nd seat frm da back door... den yk n jo sit behind him... yk is reallie being lame n insulting here... haha... cuz da guy keep nodding his head profusely... den yk folo him... wad de... damn lame... den jo hit him n stuff... haha...damn dumb one lar yk.. carn stand him... den aft da mrt stop... all went dwn except me rek n qin... ya... den rek told me tad tad guy stay aft his stop.. n ask me y yk nva alite wif his fwen(da nodding guy) lol... den i told him"fwen dusnt mean haf to stay together rite?" he said ya... derek is another big lame shit... hai~ wonder wad he n de others like yk,syy and bryan hav in deir brain??? air??? nope... erm... vacuum??? lol...

wad can i sae aft so manie tings hav happen??? ting carn begin nor can it end... i m stuck... i nva tot ting will become tis way... hai~ is tis wad i had anticipated all along?? hafnt i gt enuf??? i dun even noe y i gt tis bloody feeling again aft so long... indeed veh long...

2006-07-24T18:44:00.000+08:00

Hai~ forgive him in de end... hai~ sian si... tot i wuld nt tok to him for the whole of this week... wad de... hai~ din hav de heart to do such a ting to my fwen who is wif me for FOUR years... lol... i tink he is lyk da pic below... hai~ stoopid derek sim... well... he, syy wenjie amos n shan are always de one hu make me larf... lol... dunno... aft derek offended me i sort of offended amos... lol... is tad karma???

2006-07-21T18:50:00.000+08:00

today is freakin idiotic guy called DEREK SIM YI WEI freakin pissed me off... we were all waiting for him n amos to go n eat... me, qin,jas, sw n wyn... dey drag n drag cuz dey were playing sepat takraw... i was alr quite pissed wif dem le... so i went dwn... den i called qin hu is in da class wif dem... whether dey wana go n eat den dey came dwn... aft quite some time... tad idiot went de other way... n amos went back to class wif shan...(most prob to kick soccer) so i called him if he wanted to eat... he went: "brudder ni men yao bu yao he peiyee n qinyi ta men qu kallang macdonalds chi..." blar blar blar... den he askd his shi mu(sam) n den yang sheng... drag n drag n drag... in de end... DEY R NOT GNGING... freakin hell waste my bloody time... i feel lyk scolding him fuck off in de fone... but in de end i din... he freakin indecisiveness juz freakin pissed me of... wad de fuck...

2006-07-20T20:06:00.000+08:00

deres tis freakin person hu keeps askin me abt hu i lyk... n refuse to bloody hell tell me his or her name... wth... how m i suppose to freakin hell guess hu de F*** r u... its getting on my nerves...

If u see this.. pls freakin hell get lost frm my blog n stop all ur F***ing nonsense... unless u tell me hu de freakin hell r u... stop making me guess... its freakin annoying n freakin irritating.. dun make me use da vulgar words on u... so pls... either reveal ur bloody secret identity or scam!!!!

omg... i juz carn believe tis is happening... hai~ i juz carn da "ur best friend" person... freakin irritating... dunno wad n how to deal wif such person...

today has been an tired day... felt seh throughout the whole freakin day... well... nth much occured... onlie da oral... haha.. da teacher was a damn joker... cuz topic was on snakes den deres a passage on 2 students vincent n anthony noeing snakes n a pic... so aft de whole bloody conversation... sumting farnie happened...

teacher: i tell u a joke
me: okay
teacher: u noe wad?( he flips to da pic) i m born in the yr of da snake... (he flip to da passage) my name is also vincent.
me: *nthin to sae* *smile*

crazy teacher... wad de hell... one big joker... he also sae i was quite good in my oral... juz tad i nervous... den sae erm someting abt wad i sae in de exam... erm... "ignorance is bliss" but he said... it is not necessary so blar blar blar... haha...

den aft da oral... went to see da guys kick soccer... haha... den sae lousai n jo at da soccer court... den see deir lao gong dere... haha... den yi xiang kick da ball at lousai... den aft wk gt sub... she go find him n sae(i heard frm wyn)" da ball hit me sia" wk:" ah ya onlie tap de ball nia" or sumting liddat... wad a joke... haha... den i was teasing her... lol... den she 'rape' n 'molested' me.. wah she damn freakin violent... haha... den... ya... waitd for rek,ys,syy, jt dey all to finish kicking soccer to go hm together... den tok to amos on de bench wif wyn,sw n jas... haha... ya... da conversation was rather... er hmm... haha... ya... today is amos last day in ncc... haha... cuz he went for P.O.P (passing out parade).. yup... den jun hong went to change in his 'sexy' long pants wif onlie one leg shown... haha...

den went hm wif rek,sw,jt haha... yup... sw dn drop of at her busstop... bt folo me to my busstop... i noe y... cuz of him... hai~ wth... so damn ming sian sia... haha...

2006-07-18T17:59:00.000+08:00

I m pissed wif alot of tings lately... f***in tu lan wif elaine toh n solid hair... idiotic teachers... dey juz make me pissed wif alot of tings... den my mood juz worsen thru'out de day... sian...

today solid hair juz take my book away... i wasnt even disrupting her class... i mean... i din pay attention cuz i noe i wont understand most of the tings she said... so i mite as well make use of my time... so i did eng lit hmwrk... all of a sudden... she came n took my book... wth... siao...

Life is crap... full of one... i juz dun understand y ppl can die so easily... y i juz carn... haha... (i m not having tots of sucide.. i m juz wondering) I mean i juz feel i m wasting my time away... doing nothing meaningful enuf... i mean y not let da ppl hu die in da disaster to hav a chance to live again... recently tsunami hit indonesia AGAIN... hai! it hit java... so idiotic tsunami... killed so manie ppl... hai~ sumtimes i juz wonder y god allows disaster to happen... killing his children... i juz dun understand sia... hai~ its so sad to see tings lyk tad happening killing so manie ppl...

* sometyms i juz hate de sight of you, de voice of urs n ur idiotic gay-ness... juz get hell far away frm me... i tot we culd really gt along well... but i guess not... cuz dere r sumtings u dunno n i noe... i dun wish to noe but dey sumhw get into me... cuz noeing all dose tings u dun juz giv me trouble n misery n problems... i wish i can dun care abt dem... bt da tings juz keep repeating itself in frnt of me... n replaying n replaying LIVE!!! i carn escape frm all dose tings... its all ur fault... i nva tot tings wuld end up tis way... i reallie tot we culd be great fwens... but circumstances juz dun allow tad to happen... so i wuld juz hav to accept tings de way dey r... i hate to do so... but i muz... if not i carn free myself frm troubles n problems n misery...

i noe we carn get further... fwens r our limits... i m nt gng to persist animore cuz i got tired... i din expect myself to do a roundabout back to u again.. de whole time has been eventful.. guess tings juz meant to remain dese y since i 1st started... initially i din wana accept de fact... but recently tings hav become clearer to me.. i noe i can nva be de one.. n i oso dun wish to break da good fwenship.. so mite as well juz let it be cuz fwens r more longlasting.. i gng 2 sae bb 2 dese feelings..

2006-07-12T18:37:00.000+08:00

I was told by lion to do tis tingy... haha...

1. Do the following WITHOUT complains
2. Choose 5 people to do this after you completed yours
see bottom..~

Favourites
favourite colour: Black, luminious green and orange
favourite food: aniting to do wif potatoes(x-cept shit n urine)
favourite song: jay's songs and all da sad sad songs
favourite movie: pirates of the caribbean
favourite day of the week: tuesday(i dunno y)
favourite season: winter...
favourite ice-cream: chocolate freckles, lime sherbet

Currents
current mood: sad and complicated
current taste: not eating anitig nw
current clothes: tees and a short
current desktop: ???
current toenail: juz toenails!!!
current time: 1843
current surroundings: HDB?
current annoyances: hav to study for prelims and O's

Firsts
first best friend: erm... Yun Zhen, pri sch fwen??
first crush: u dunnit to noe tis...
first movie:woah... tad's lyk so long ago.. erm.. i tink its Hercules..
first lie: erm pri sch?

Lasts
last cigarette: i hate cigarette smell!!!
last drink: erm.. a month ago?
last car ride: tis morning to sch?
last crush: u oso dunnit to noe tis
last movie: erm.. She's the man?
last phone call: to my tuition teacher
last CD played: Jay chou

Have you ever have you ever dated your best friend: nope..
have you ever broken the law: yes... i litter and jay-walk...
have you ever been arrested: i m still here!!!
have you ever skinny-dipped: NOPE
have you ever been on tv: i dun tink so
have you ever kissed someone you don't know: no...

Five things you are wearing: ear studs, specs, tees, shorts and under garments!
Four things you done today: study, biatching, writing, booby talking?
Three things you can hear right now: tv adverts, typing & sum1 downstairs makin farnie noises
One thing you do when you are bored: sleep
Five people to do this quiz : anione
==================================================

tings hav gone de way i least expected... hai~ dere is nth i can do to stop tis for its not my tinking... hai~ i nva wanted to be in tis mess again... god played a joke on me... letting me return to the mess i was in... tis is so farnie... i tot i learnt my mistake bt its does not seem so... i dunno how m i gng to cope wif tis mess again... god pls let me off...

tad f***ing elaine toh juz pissed me off... wah lao... i was doing da last calculation n she at first allowed me to do da last qn for da quiz... den... freaking hell she grab my paper while i was calculating.. WTF... irritating shit... she allowed me to do den she take away my paper... freak u... so mani ppl u haven collect go collect deirs 1st la... y muz insist on collecting mine... freak u la...

i nva knew lyking him wuldbe hard.. nva tot so... i hav to keep everyting to myself... i onlie told her... but... nth helps... its seems more of a problem den solving my previous problem... at least i wont noe some tings... bt da damage is done... now i m back into my old self... larfing to fu yan ppl... his actions towards her juz made me feel crap...

2006-07-11T19:45:00.000+08:00

Hai~ dese few days have been hard... i dun wish to sae it here... crappy tings have happen when i least expected... i m confused by how words are conveyed... r dey meant to be so or m i suppose to read between the lines? i reallie dunno... its seem so real yet i felt sumting different... wad m i suppose to do wif tis shit... hai~ i m stucked... juz lyk before... i din expect tings to be going tis way... dere are many time i wanted to stop myself... but... i carn... i juz carn... it juz gets on and on... further and further wifout ani prior notice... wad m i suppose to do? to cont suffering or m i to let go?? i din noe i was moving in circles until lyk about 1 mth plus ago... reallie in circles... wad a joke god is playing on me... haha... m i suppose to larf???

y muz ppl do stoopid tings to get crushes attention??? dusnt she noe she is actuallie irritating a lot of ppl... is reallie a lot... for dose hu noe da insider info... but... hai~ all she can see is him... where got fwens... now is him him n him... not us us n us... i felt so stoopid to be rather annoyed by such actions... she alwaes tries to get close to him and will everytime amm chio when we ji siao her...n her amm chio-ing is veh serious... wad the hell la... r we suppose to humor her wif such tings... so that she can be freed frm her gloomy face??? i m not de only one who is annoyed... i din expect her to do such tings... for she was the one who commented de same tings on other ppl... so farnie... she is doing wad she criticise on others... lol...

wenjie is rather troubled wif her... cuz she avoided him lyk siao... hai~ i tink he gavh er too much pressure... seriously... i din noe he is da possessive sort... but perhaps he din noe abt it... but its perhaps veh tiring for her... to cope wif such tings... i tink its too much of a burden... for i tink she din not reallie love him... but perhaps crush on him... she found tad out too late... in the end it hurts both her and him... esp him who gav his heart to her... hai~ wenjie... i understand y u put ona mask... u juz wanted to get away frm it.. wishing to let go and leave the sufferings... but u carn... so learn how to face it... i noe its hard... cuz i was once no twice in such a situation... i nva tot i wuld pulled it through... but i did... hai~ i tried to smile my way through in sch... at first i found it hard... but i soon got de hang of it... and cont "smiling".. for quite a long period of time i m lyk u... forget how to smile frm my heart... cuz de pain juz keep pressing upon the wound... but the onlie wae i can help u is to ask u to let go... cuz its not worth it animore.. when a girl saes she duznt love u animore... dere is no hope in trying ani harder to win her heart... cuz all u wuld get is her hating u even more... i noe letting go is hard... but pls try... i overcame it... i hope u too will overcome it... i noe u can do it... u hav my support... i'll owaes be dere for u... now i start to come out of my shell learn how to larf frm my heart again... thx to my fwen like u... derek... zer... u guys hav made tings easier for me... made tings worth larfing for...

neva expected that he wuld w8 for me... as wad he saes so... i dunno whether is he reallie waiting for me... cuz i dunno wad he is tinking... seriously... xian zai de ta cares more abt me... but also abt others... i nva can guess hu he reallie lyks... i see him and his fwens having fun... i dunno it is juz so attractive... i noe i sounded sick but he is attractive... or at least to dose hu lyk him... i hope how he looks into my eyes is wad i predicted it wuld be... i juz hope so... but i noe it'll nva happen... cuz... its juz too complicated... wad does he mean to describe my fwen as wad he told me is attractive to him when i m nxt to her... wad's tad??? m i suppose to take the hint tad she is the one for him??? or m i suppose to read his underlying meaning tad he is tryingto convey sumting to me... wad m i suppose to do... i guess i will neva get to noe... or perhaps i alr knew de ans tad he will nva be mine???

2006-07-10T19:32:00.000+08:00

today is farn farn day... haha... PC is free period... so we started to use da rubber bands to shoot one another... i was so angry wif derek sim cuz, he shoot me damn hard wif his rubber band... damn it... it became one patch of red sia... stoopid guy... haha... den i shoot choon kuat on his neck... haha guess wad... da mark was bloody nice... i wanted to take a picture of it but... stoopid he dun let me take... but its was reallie nice...

on sat was stoopid sch aniversary... wah de helll... in da audi was damn damn bloody hot... wah... cannot tahan sia... all da fan all not blowing in our direction but da guests freak da sch man!!!

i waited 4 da bus wif ***... althou i got scolded by daddy... but its alrite... cuz i sat bus wif my best fwen!!! haha... well... tad nite we msg alot... cuz *** wanted to get inside info frm me abt *****... haha... i carn of cuz.. but we had a nice chat... got to noe *** even better... it was worth while... i dare sae... haha... nth mean more than to noe my fwen better...

2006-07-07T16:44:00.000+08:00

dese days i hav been rebelling... against teachers like Elaine TOH who is a f***ing ass*ole... kept saing SHAR LUP SHAR LUP... f*** y*u... n oso helmet HO!! another f***ing ass*ole... a bigger one... she is getting up my nerves... i got scolded by her bcuz i whispered??? wad logic is tis... i was WHISPERING to wyn... i wasnt SHOUTING!!! so i din disturb her class... who de hell she tink she is to scold me for whispering... as thou i m speaking abt her hair or some ting... F*** of*... i was damn angry wif her on weds in her bloody geog lsn bcuz of tis... bt shan n derek sort of made it better... cuz dey knew i was f***ing angry wif her... so tis is wad dey sae: "dun angry come here i giv u a k***... lol... it was tis tad made me larf... i tink i m reallie fortunate to have den as fwens... dey r reallie great...

i haven been doing hmwrk... all i did was slack... my results r dropping lyk siao... i dunno how n wad to do... hav to go for remedials for even lit... hai~ see dava's face... sian sia... but at least i noe he wont be lyk da helmet ho!!!

soon it will be da FIFA world cup finals... i was damn sad tad portugal is out... i was expecting dem to go into de finals n clinching da title... sian... all cuz of france tyconess... hai~ henry juz did not deserve da penalty... toking abt da penalty... if only ricardo juz stretch abit further.... portugal wuld hav WON!!! hai~ but... tad bloody blady... zizou juz too old... tot he wont go in... in de end... still went in... hai~ tad match almost made me loose my mind... cuz tad bloody referee did not giv portugal penalties when da french trip da portugese players!!! esp ronaldo... dey DESERVE dem... hai~ referee is reallie KAYU!!! i hate tad UKRAINE referee.. hope he go back tad time fall n sprain his leg... stoopid ass.. so now i betting on portugal tad dey will win n clinch de 3rd position!!!

more problems evolving rather than resolving.. hai~ i reallie dunno how... m i suppose to giv up lyk how i use to??? how m i gng to stand it to actuallie see dem so close... hai~ i was oso de one hu let dem hav a chance to be together... to have more time together... m i crazy... i dunno... but i carn bring myself to hurt her... aniwae... i dun tink he will eva lyk me... so mite as well be da one hu will be dere for him... when he needed someone one to tok to... but i noe even tis wont happen... cuz he keeps tings to himself... or at least to me... tads wad i tot so... so i tink we onlie can be fwens.... juz plain fwens... hai~ hw m i suppose to let him go... now tad he rid de other guy and occupies my heart now... it reallie hurts me to noe my fwens oso lyk him... n we onlie culd be fwens... but dere is nth else i culd do but to wait... wait for eternity...

2006-07-04T17:25:00.000+08:00

well... found out tad fwenship which seemed to be strong are not strong at all... if u noe wad i mean... hai~ so it is almost aint possible to find a reallie gd fwen.. a confidant... at least i tink so... it hurts me to find out tad my deepest secret is being told to someone else... da one who tell it is actuallie my gd fwen!!! or who i consider my best of fwen... hu wuld hav expected tings wuld happen tis way... i find tad its hard to trust anione... everyone perhaps except my family members... but i will neva tell my darkest secret to them... for dey dun understand me at all.. all dey see is HOMEWORK, RESULTS and BETTER RESULTS!!! i hate tis way of life!!!

fwen whom i tot i culd trust actuallie are de ones hu back stab me... tis is so farnie... tis happen to me once in pri sch n now in sec sch... god is playing a joke on me... hai~

wyn gt pissed of wif someone who AA... haha... i mean if u lyk someonw u dunnit to lyk act blur or sumting to get his attention rite... i hate it too!!!

i dunno wad to sae abt da shit i m in... i will nva noe wad's gona happen... cuz he seems unpredictable...

2006-07-03T19:28:00.000+08:00

I DID NOT WHINE... for goodness sake... i did not n i dun whine to ask ppl to walk out of sch wif me!!! i said " bu yao jiu suan le" i din whine like how ** said. i did not whine!!! not at all!!! damn angry when i saw tis freakin sentence... WTH... i can do tings alone.. i dunnit to whine to force ppl to do things my way or to get wad i want... so pls... use the CORRECT vocab...

well, today i went to eat dim sum wif qin,kel,wyn,wen,rek,mos,shujia,ger,car,jus,dawn,sam and lion... we went to harbour front to eat dimsum... it sounded so crazy... de food dere oso not veh nice... i dunno y dey want to go dere... ya... actuallie i din feel lyk gng... dunno y... juz din feel lyk gng... so tings juz erupted inside me... hai~ these tings erupted at a "perfect" time... wow... should i thank tad person for it??? aniwae... we ate ALOT... its reallie alot... yup... felt lyk i m gng to burst.. haha... actuallie i dun ate much... din hav da appetite to eat... but geraldine, rek, sam and lion ate ALOT!!! omg... dey oso ordered some wierd tings lyk GREEN TEA BAO.. sounded disgusting so i din eat... dey reallie got WIERD food dere!!!

aft tad 'good' dimsum we had i had to leave early to go back hm to do my SS... wad the hell... damn seh sia... SS was like shyt... i m still rushing tru it now... juz hope to finish it quickly... haha... so yazeed can disappear frm my mind...

da portugal and england match was lyk damn cool... haha... din expect rooney to be sent off... he was damn bad... he step on cavalho's little brother... omg... wif his studs... it muz be real painful... he still push c.ronaldo... hate him for it... he deserved to be sent off... ricardo performed great tad nite... saved penalties frm lampard and gerrard... althou i support dem... but still i will root for portugal...haha... i was damn happie tad ronaldo scored the decisive penalty... he is great!!! derek and wyn hated him... haha... well its too bad he is the one who send ENGLAND HOME... cuz he rocked too much... learn to love him!!! haha...

got to noe some shyt stuff again todae... but it duznt matter animore... cuz i decided not to care animore... juz hated wad eva tad is happen to me now..

2006-06-29T18:28:00.000+08:00

today i am a ghost... thx arh derek and choon kuat... ur jie zuo... still cook up some stoopid story abt my death... haha... veh farnie arh guys!!! well the story goes like tis: "pei yee tumble down de stairs cuz she din balance herself well... so she died... her death was partly cause by ppl hu feed her wif alot of food!!!" wow... derek u r a great story teller... so great indeed... tis story spread to suwen and amos... wow... so i m a ghost hu have lots of super powers cuz i can lift alot of tings like papers, fork to eat lunch at KFC(wif dese bunch of "humans":derek, jt, amos,s uwen n jasmine) and i can hit choon kuat!!! wow!!! -_-... wad else can i say??? today was not a okay day for me... far from okay... got to noe sumting tad i dun wish to noe... it sort of hit me hard... ya... but i can do nth abt it... nt at all... i dunno y... but i carn get it off my mind... hai~ such tings keep happening... wad a big joke god is playing on me... i noe i shldnt hav cont. but... hai~ wad eva... i dont care n i dont wana care...

y did he hav to be lyk tad? so caring and stuff... i dun wan... y did he hav to tell me indirectly he paid attention to my stuff?? y muz he do tad? stop.. juz stop!! i dun wan to let my get into da mess again!!! not again!!! i carn take it animore... cuz if it happens again i noe i carn take it like how i take it for da bastard!! dat ass... cuz it so torturing... but i noe he and i hav no hope... i juz hope all dese are juz my tinking.. not aniting tad's true... cuz... cuz... hai~ i dunno wad actuallie he was trying to do.. cuz it seems like he paid attention to me... but it also seem like he did tad to all other ppl.. i dunno!!!!

2006-06-26T18:39:00.000+08:00

damnit... i bet on portugal to win 2-1... da score was 1-0... wtf.. bloody pissed...

hai~ lots of hmwork to finish... lots of tings to do n want to do... but i juz dun hav the energy n determination...

he'll alwaes be de best.. in my <3.. dun insult him cuz he cry... he's still a boi not a man... yup!! at least he is not lyk some shits like bloody van nistelrooy gng around critisising ppl when he din get a chance to play... haha...

2006-06-22T18:47:00.000+08:00

ytd watch da portugal vs mexico match... damn it... dun hav cristiano ronaldo... so disappointed... sian sia... carn see him play... sniff sniff... lol.. aniwae ytd match was sian sian sian... hai~ ya...

i got mistaken by louisa... well " i'm not tad person!!" pls... dun xiang wai okay?? haha... but aniwae... it was rather...

hai~ someone i know likes a guy hu is her good fwen... she was like damn sad when he is veh good wif other girls... hai~ she wans to noe whether he likes her anot... but by asking she will lose her good fwens... i oso dunno hw to help her... see her so depressed i oso dunno hw...

love is juz crap... or is it crushing on someone... hai~ eventhou it givs ppl moments of happiness... but mostly it givs ppl misery and depressing moments... tis is juz so sucky... it just hurt ppl too much... esp girls... alwaes da victim... if onlie we can control our emotions... stop ourselves frm loving to prevent us frm gettin hurt by some irritating shits...

aft all tad i learn to let go... let go of dose happie memories... i noe dere's no road of return... so i had and must let go... keeping all tad somewhere deep and untouchable... so tad dere's way ppl can use it to hurt me again... i noe i'll neva let go if all tad din happen... i'm glad it did... eventhou it had been hard but i noe its worth while... at least i tot so... at least i tot i did...

2006-06-21T18:14:00.000+08:00

these days have been busy busy n busy... hai~ all da homework haven finish... i dunno how m i gng to complete all... i'm just dead... hai~

world cup started haven been able to watch all da matches cuz i dun have cable... hai~ sian.. carn go to mac's in da middle of da nite oso... no lyk some cheaters like DEREK SIM hu got an additional antenna to tap da indonesia channel... one big cheater!!!! sian... hai~ so have to watch da highlights from channelnewsasia... freakin sian... but ytd manage to watch da germany vs ecuador... haha... klose was veh pro... i dun lyk tad podolski n asamora( dunno how to spell his name but i noe he is no.14 n he is da onlie black in da german team)... ya... den tad stoopid derek haolian... sae he wana call me at 3am since i carn watch da england vs sweden match... stoopid guy... den in de end he msg me... i was alr sleeping... crazy guy!!! so i switch off da vibration!!! haha... *evil lafter*... but in the end he still wake up earlier den me... lol... i tink i slp too too much... i woke up at 11am tis morning... lol... den stoopid haf to go sch for some stoopid physics practical!!! wad a shit...

today got portugal n mexico!!! yay... got my favourite player cristiano ronaldo!!! carn miss him out!!!

2006-06-15T18:04:00.000+08:00

went to seoul gardens wif da hk trip ppl... ppl lyk: derek, amos, qinyi, JT, wyn, sheeting, jiali, dawn.t, w.dawn, rachel boo, shern, ashley, ailin, sze xuan n yukai. yup. i waited for ST n JL at bugis mrt at 11.30... cuz dey late so have to wait a while longer for dem... den... i stood outside guardians... den got one man approach me... wanting me to donate money... den i said no... haha...(I M A BAD person..lol..)

tad stoopid derek sim.. call me at 11.55 when i was wif ST n JL n ask me if i gt go Seoul garden.. i alr reach bugis le.. n den he ask me y i nva wait for him at aljunied mrt.. -_- so farnie arh derek sim... so i told him tad i alr reaach bugis at 11.30... u noe wad he sae :" i was at aljunied at 11.30.." den i ask him" where r u nw???" he said" oh... i m at aljunied now..." wth la... frm 11.30 to 11.55 he is at aljunied!!! wth... wad he do dere stomachache arh?? haha... when he reach le... he call me again... he ask me where r we... den i sae i at seiyu... he ask us to go to bugis mrt to meet da rest cuz A LOT of dem waiting for us dere... guess wad... when we reach dere we onlie saw him n qinyi... he dare sae A LOT of ppl... wth la... carn stand him... den waited for JT n tad bloody amos took so damn long to reach bugis cuz he over slept... wth.. he damn dua bai leh.. so ya no choice... have to wait for tad da shao ye... haha... so me, ST, dawn.t, boo n JL went to seoul garden to meet shern dey all 1st..

we started to eat frm lyk 12.30 to 3.. wth la... damn freakin full.. we were larfing n toking veh loudly den da whole world seemed to be looking at us... wad de... haha... aft Seoul, we went walk walk... den we wakl to tis shop nxt to da neoprint shop... guess wad i saw... some silicon ball tingy... den i took two... n i ask derek to walk over n ask him to pull his collar... haha... cuz i wanted to put da silicon balls into his shirt... MUAHAHA... i m evil... lol... ya... den da yukai sae to me... wah u so big still nid meh... wth la... wad a great idea he had...

* derek n amos... will u guys pls stop askin me to take off my hat when i got a stoopid hair cut... i have no choice okay!

*jiali i dun look lyk paparazzi cuz of my hat...

feelings evoked

2006-06-14T13:41:00.000+08:00

aft all dose tings tad happened its seems tad even if i tried my hardest i find it hard to accept certain tings... tings tad i carn forget no matter how i tried to... tings tad i tried to avoid but i carn get away... wad can i do to actuallie get away from all these crap? i dunno how to...
i've been tinking if all dese din start will de situation for me now be better??? will it? i seriously dunno...

i find it hard to accept tad i *** ******** again... seriously i dunno wad's wif me... i wan to get of of tis mess... its getting crazy... how?? i muznt get deeper in to tis shitty mess...

monday went to sch to have some amaths-engchiu b4 ponning to go watch omen wif jas,suwen,jt and mos... yup... da show was ok... half da time i was scared by da gals in da cinema screaming and not da show... WTF... da spawn of satan, damien is veh cute looking but his eyes is scary... omg... i wonder if such tings were to happen now... where and hu will tis spawn be??? the movie also showed many evidence of wad was written in da book of revelations abt da seven trumpets... it seems like da angels have blown da third trumpet(wad i tot but da movie da fifth trumpet was blown)... i dunno whether i m mad or wad... but da movie made everyting so real... r we reallie near to da judgement day??? is jesus realli coming down???

2006-06-07T18:10:00.000+08:00

Hong Kong was fun... esp da ppl spending time wif me... haha... well... gt to noe dese ppl better... despite all da compos we had to rite fer MC... but... we nva lose our farn in da hair spray n hair dresser... da ppl hu went shld noe wad i mean...

nonetheless its more problems for me... dun wish to speak abt it here... haha...

interesting pics

derek sleeping so soundly...

my breakfast...

problem just worsen aft de hk trip

2006-06-07T11:07:00.000+08:00

i'm dead... reallie dead... after all tad had happen... i'm lost... tis is reallie a shit case... hai~ just realized something tad i shld not be happening... how??? tis is juz crap... i jus got damn fuked up by it... i shldnt **** ***** ***... how??? but aft all tad... i dunno how to explain... just dead... but ** ****d more abt ***... guess ** **** ***... tad's y its gettin more n more shitty... i can see it frm *** eyes...

da trip was fun fun n fun... haha... well... JT now gt a gal frm HK hu lyks him... haha... called BETTY... well aft noeing he kena ji siaod everytime... hehe... Amos fell in love wif tis chio gal called natalie... haha... she gt da mixed blood look... damn cool lar... she kinda looked lyk emma watson in person... so cool rite??

gt tis guy we saw in YLMASS he is rather short... maybe same height as me... he damn cute n oso shuai... haha... de ppl call him AI ZAI... so farnie... lol...

well all da ppl tad went we farn... got to noe some veh cute juniors hu tink da sec4s are veh dao n unfriendly kind... haha... lyk wong dawn, dawn teo, rachel boo, ashley, shermaine, yu kai, walter, jerline and quite a few other... mostly ppl tad went are sec 4s so... ya... haha...

more of hong kong in da nxt blog...

2006-05-29T16:09:00.000+08:00

so freaking pissed wif da exam seating arrangement... i juz hate it...

how culd i ever get away from reality... reality juz sucks... y carn it be lyk wad tv shows are showing? haahaa... where one culd lose memory or CHOOSE to lose SPECIFIC memory? wad can i do to get tad???

gng hongkong in lyk 3 daes time... wondering how i wuld spend my time dere.. how time will juz stop den... den i culd forget everyting here... maybe except my family members... i juz wish to forget da memories tad are haunting me...

but dere's nth i can do... except to w8...
===========================================

todae is chinese o'lvl... hai~ hope i do well in it *cross fingers* da compo din even have a single narrative... wad the... got descriptive, arguementative/discursive and a stoopid newspaper report... damn it... i tink i gng to flung my bloody compo... all dese are not wad i usuallie write... tis is so great...

2006-05-28T09:54:00.000+08:00

so long since i posted on tis blog.. so mani tings have happened... time has past and gone... hai~ wad can i reallie do to make da time stop?? i reallie dunno n i carn do dat... hai~ even if i culd... it is meaningless alr... seriously i dunno wad's happening to me... my whole world is lyk damn F*** up lar... hai~

for da past few daes we had lesson in da innosphere... stoopid place... whenever i walked past ******E ***N... she seems to be diaoing me... ALL THE TIME!!! WTF man... wad did i do? i din do aniting... den y da hell she diao me for... crazy... as if i did aniting to her man... FUCK U!!! my goodness as thou ppl sae dose rumours got to do wif me... as if i started dem... HALLO!!! is ur brains empty or wad... y wuld i do such a ting to xia suay myself... pls ppl use ur brain... i'm damn pissed wif her diaoing me for no reason... use ur eyeball for someting more useful!!!

YAY!! going to hongkong le... haha... wif my FWENS!!! its going to be fun n no PARENTS!!! hahas... well... i m gng to buy loads of tings... haha... yep...we are going DISNEYLAND!!! haha... sounded lyk i m a kid... haha... well i still am... oops...

wad a stoopid ting

2006-04-12T18:19:00.000+08:00

mondae was de worse dae... assembly i sat IN FRONT of *********... freak... wah lau... suwen, amos, jasmine and wenjie ji siao me... so bloody idiotic... wenjie went **** and ***... stoopid... look at de screen... see... is mr khoo... scold him lar... i was like... wadeva...

ytd i wana pass de Hong kong form to ms wan... den she is in da conference rm... guess who is inside??? *********... F*** man.. he look at me i lookhim... diao... bloody hell... wad a stoopid situation... ya lo... wah lau... lousai gave me tad stoopid look and den de su wen ji siao me... two IDIOTs... wth... i hate dem... wah lau den i sae bye bye to albert and lousai... den suwen sae... pei u ferget to sae goodbye to sumone... i was like diaoz.... lame...

todae da hongkeong ppl came to our sch fer a dae... stoopid... daryl's buddy was lyk damn shuai... haha... but rek's buddy was like... erhh... omg... but well... deir cantonese was like WOAH...damn bloody fluent... hai~ i feel lyk so lao ya... hai~ but aniwae... i went hm with bryan n he crap all de wae hm... we met putput on da bus... haha... well... as usual bryan tok abt how de other gals are attracted to him... i was lyk... ya wadeva... lol...he nva change a bit... reallie miss all
da 2md 04 ppl... okay mayb not all...

i ripped tis pic frm shining's blog...

Serangoon Garden vs ChungCheng

2006-04-06T18:11:00.000+08:00

hai we lost to Serangoon Gardens by 2 points 60-58!!! but we did great!! proud of my sch... is juz tad we suai kena de damn qiang teams in da ba qiang... got unity, serangoon gardens, woodland ring and de other group got ahs, catholic high, woodgrove and one other sch.. carn rmb...

but ya.. da b'bois n da coach have smiles on deir face thruout da game so farnie... haha... well he onlie shoot one 3 point den nva play liaoz... den ahma did alot of 3-pointer... haha... dey reallie put up a great fight la...

stoopid su wen n jolene make all those stoopid commends... i hate dem... sae wad he lookin n stuff... my FOOT!!! we saw da nan hua captain... he was quite cute... haha... n he kept lookin in da direction where me,jo n suwen were sitting... haha...

All over

2006-01-03T17:24:00.000+08:00

all ova is all i can sae... hai~ all him AGAIN todae in sch.. i realli realli hope i can actualli flee frm reality.. away frm tis bloody sch...most importantlie away frm him... i realli realli hate to see him again... he realli broke my heart into pieces tad nite... tad very nite... de last time i'm goin to tok to him... i'd wish i din even tell him how i feel towards him... its so bloody stupid of me to actualli tell a heartless person abt my heart... abt me lykin him... wad a damn fool i m... hai~ i'm a real idiot...

Assembly took up de 1st 2 hrs of de dae.. half wae tru de tokin' heard screamings frm de back... frm nana n racheline.. den i saw a WORM crawlin on racheline's skirt... its bloody disgusting... n whenit drop frm de skirt it stil hav a string of silk hanging frm de skirt... YUCK!...

amos n racheline is our v-chair n chair respectiveli... haha... when choosin hu shld be v-chair or chair tad time... nana sae tad guy shld take care of girls...haha... den gues wad amos sae... " work and ROMANCE is not de same!!!" is he hinting at sumting we all shld noe...haha...

2dae in class i find tad everyting seemed new again... so much as so i tot i hav to re-adapt to a new environment... i hate tis feeling... seeing familiar faces isnt good enuf at all hai~ wyn make fun of me n green man AGAIN 2dae... n when qinyi saw teddie... she screams fer me... i realli realli dun wan to hav aniting to do wif CG... ani of de members!!! probably except my lil brudder sandy.. hai~ it is juz bloody shit...

K700i to N6680 to 02 PDA fone to N3200??

2005-11-23T16:10:00.000+08:00

WTF... i downgrade fone... sian... hai~ i dun tink i wuld get N70... sian... n PDA fone is so bloody mar fan... hai~ WTF bring my n3200 fone out so bloody dui lian... wtf man... hai~ i realli dunno wad to do... sian... hai~ perhaps in de end i may get a beta fone or a worse fone compare to my k700i... hai~ hoping to get N70... tad's da bez... haha... but... hai~ looks impossible to me...

todae went skool to hav physics retest... sian... den... i realise i din bring my pencil box n calculator... haha... luckily got zhang han... tis guy ar... keep suaning me... n den keep asking ppl fer my msn n fone no.. siao one... haha... he veh pervertic... hai~ owaes jisiao abt my bra colour... siao one la... hai~ den saw amos ang... haha... he got ncc todae... he summore go cut a veh gu gu hair... wah... i see liao...i carn help larfing... lame... well... todae wenjie tell me all abt OBS... hai~ haha... keep suaning me... cuz i carn go OBS wif dem... hai~ sian sia... seem veh farn... by da wae he describe... haha... woah... yong keong i s veh disgusting sia.... he URINE in da sea 4 times... yuck... when he urine summore nid ppl's kayak to surround him... wad de... woah... i realli nva see a more disgusting guy... erm perhaps besides shawn... haha... wenjie oso told me abt wyn... haha... but is da gurls dunno her... i mean... me n her sort of da same de... cuz... we go beta wif guys.... haha... not so much of gurls... ya... but perhaps sum parts she ova do... haha... i wont do tad in front of so mani guys... well... unless is all my close guy fwens... haha... well... hai~ i din study... den alot of qns i dun even how to do lo.. sian... hai~ can imagine i even 4get f=ma.. wtf man... hai~ i cheated in both retest... physics n chem.. hai~ but the cheating 4 physics is lyk of no use... hai~

sian... its been lyk12 daes since 11/11... da dae when we finally make clear to each other... hai~ i hate tad bloody dae... hai~ i juz hate it... but... i m not going to care abt him animore... even thou i still will miss him... still... i dun wan to care animore...well... it duznt matter animore... haha...

over

2005-11-16T15:42:00.000+08:00

finallie over... no longer hav to broad over tad bloody shyt... hai~ althou now i still will tink of him.. but... not as much le... hai~ cuz i noe he dunsnt appreciate... even if i were to care so much oso no use.. cuz... de dun care animore... so wad for go n care about him... i m sick n tired of care so much for him... wad do i??? more hurt n misery... i brought dis upon my own grave... hai~

perhaps... i nva shld hav started to like him... hai~ but i noe... god hav in store greater tings in my life den him...

look in to de future is so hard now... i dare not move... how i wish to have a pair of helping hands hu can hold my hand n guide me... out of tis deep shyt i m in... hai~ tml still got chem retest... sian... haha... guess i'll fail again...

well... it dusnt matter animore.. hai~
I DUN CARE!!!

de end???

2005-11-11T16:51:00.000+08:00

i realli wan to gib up on him... hai~ wad's da bloody point of holding on to him n da memories... when he din even wan to tok... he don even wan to tok to me now... " i've nth to tok to u" wad m i to him... yong le jiu diu le de tissue??? i realli hate him... i hate english lecture... i dun wan to see his face... i dun wan my fwens to tease me wif his name... i dunwan to care animore... i dun wan to bump into him... i dun wan i dun wan i dun wan...

god.. why u choose to struck me down now... why... why... i wan to giv up... but where eva i go i see him... where eva i go i tink of him... wad eva i do i tink of him... wad's my bloody problem... LORD why u owaes play jokes wif me... i carn take tis joke... its hurting me too too much... i wan to cry... i realli wan to cry... but... it wont help...

i realli envy dose gurls hu can tok to him... lyk star... lyk... mee sua... lyk tingzi... why... wad happen to our relationship... i wan to cry... why muz he be da one whu change my wae of lyfe... y... y muz he oso be da one hu break my heart...

i actually wanted to gib him tad letter i rote... but i tot for one whole dae... i decided not to gib... i dun hav da courage... he realli made me suffer... wad m i to do now... he dun wan to tok to me... den... leave me dere... wad m i to him all along???

hearing jaychou's song... hei se maoyi... i realli wan to cry... i realli wan to cry... hai~ but crying dun help in aniwae... i realli dunno wad to do le...

abc

2005-10-25T08:06:00.000+08:00

haha... todae mr soh nva come... haha... yah... now got one ol' woman relieving him... sian... see her oso sian... hai~ carn even switch on da radio... hai~ but i heck her... juz switch on softer lo... haha... now every1 arund me r slacking lyk hell... haha... onli a few hardworking ppl lyk qing.. amos n wyntrice... hai~ do i hav to be lyk dem??? haha... maybe i shld... since my results r so freakin lan... haha... i hope tad bloody amos stop calling me pastry... i hate da bloody name... somemore... stoopid yong yeh call me fishball... sian sia...

2005-10-14T14:11:00.000+08:00

sian tml muz go to sch fer tad bloody sec 4 graduation tingy... sian... hai... downloading da damn patchment fer maple freaking slow... keep getting stuck... sian.. woah lao... carn play n carn do aniting...sian man.. hai~ asking fer help now... bloody hell.. sian...

hai~ sian... hai~ da file damn big 88mb...
sian... sian la...

hai~ dava ask us to go bowling on 19/10/05... sian.. bowl wif keong n yan n jt... sian... sheeting n jiali n lousai oso not dere...nlie got shern... do u tink shern will go??? hai~ i dun tink so lo... wan me to bowl wif keong n yan...no wae man... hai~ i rather go home n slp... hai~ wadeva... aniwae i not intending to go JC wad fer hav CCA points??? haahaa... i wan to go SINGAPORE POLY... my aim to get into da business n management course... haha... i will onlie go into a JC if my L1R5 is a one digit... haha... cuz i dun wan to go lousy jc juz to get into a university... haha... cuz... i dun wan to do badly den drop to POLY to study again... waste my bloody time... hai~ haha...if i can make it into a JC i wan to study psychology in university n be a psychologist... not psychiatrist... haha..i dun wan to face MAD ppl...haha...

ai yi ge ren jiu yao dong de fang shou...perhaps its realli time to giv up le... hai~ ya... its realli time... he oso dun care aniwae... so ya... wad's da point of holding onto a past tad one i care abt??? he din even gav a dmn abt aniting... ever since last year... haahaa... i tink its realli veh sadistic... ya... haha... wad to do?? haha... last nite i read daily bread... came across " everyting tad happen has a purpose" haha... so duz it mean tad if one murders is god hu wan tad to happen on purpose??? perhaps he juz wan to test da person if he can abstain frm sinning??? ya... i belief tad is da case... haha... ya... so perhaps got made him come into my life n let him go is to challenge me wif tis temptation...

maybe its time i go see a doctor abt my back... haha... sumting is bloody rong... fergetit i dun wan to cuz my parents to worry... hai~

2005-10-13T19:54:00.000+08:00

some ppl to rmb...

marvin>>> 3rd frm da left.. mid row
jeremy>>> 4th frm da left.. mid row
peizhi >>> 3rd frm da rite mid row
freddy>>> da left one lying on da ground
pingwei>>> da rite one lying on da ground
kenneth>>> on da rite of da gurl wearing red t-shirt
papasan>>> guy wearing red
malay guy>>> da 1st on da left... mid row

2005-10-12T16:48:00.000+08:00

TML LAST paper...

juz realize tad exam is so much fun...
haha...

well... tml r we still going out???

start of exams

2005-10-06T13:31:00.000+08:00

die ler lar...

my ss and english die le...

eng so freakin hard...

ss i din even hav time to finish sia...

sian...

i die le...

i saw him tis morning he so shuai sia...

SW ask me if i saw him...

i sae i din see him...

but i long ago saw him le...

hai~

ya...

dun tink we can be lyk last time le...

haha...

well...

i m going to try to make myself ferget him...

hai~

sian...

tml still got chinese paper2 n e-maths...

still got lyk 5 daes of exam...

i HATE exam period...

hai~

if i cuz juz sleep fereva...

it wuld be so damn good...

no more tiring daes...

no more trouble...

dun haf to see him n remind myself of da freakin memories...

dun haf to go tru all da pain...

dun haf to face my bloody parents...

dun haf to carry a whole lot of responsibility...

my life juz SUCK

aft exams

2005-10-04T18:41:00.000+08:00

time flies... so fast starting exam le.. haha... den is lyk... bloody shit... i haven study yet... sian... hai~ well... guess its time to die... haha... lousai sae she wana ask him along to watch DARK WATERS... pls lo as thou he'll go... sian... wad da hell...

haha... 2dae wyn n wenjie tokin abt da jasmine again... sae she act cute...blar blar... hai~ haha... woah... suwen's blog got derek's foto... haha... woah she tok abt da raining dae abt she n derek... woah.. so... yuck..

haha... took tis frm zhihao's fwenster pic... i tink all of dem look veh dumb... haha... lyk help to promote our skool lyk tad... haha...

***n*** realli lyk him le...
hai~
how... wad to do... sian...
i realli dunno le... hai~

hai~ die le... exam die le... sian...

2005-08-12T19:22:00.000+08:00

ALL ABOUT HOW MUCH U LOVE SOMEONE?

1. You are walking to yourboy/girlfriend's house. There are two roads to get there. One is a straight path to take you there quickly, but very boring. The other is significantly longer but is full ofwonderful sights and interesting things. Which one do you take to get to your significant other'shouse, short or long?

2. On the way you see two rose bushes. One is full of red roses, the other full of white roses. You decide to pick 20 roses for your boy/girlfriend of any one color or two color combination. What number of white and/or red do you pick?

3. You finally get to their house. A family member answers the door. You can have the family member get your boy/girlfriend or go get them yourself. Which do you do?

4. You go up to your boy/girlfriend's room, but nobody is there. You decide to leave the roses. Do you leave them by the window sill or on the bed?

5. Later, it's time for bed. You and your boy/girlfriend sleep in separate rooms. In the morning when it's time to wake up, you go into his/her room and check on him/her. When you arrive, do you prefer him/her to be awake or asleep?

6. Now it's time to go back home. Do you take the short, plain or more interesting road?

Meaning Of Love Test-----------------------------------------------------------------------

1. The road represents your attitude towards falling in love. You chose the short road--you fall in love quickly and easily. You chose the long road--you take your time and do not fall in love easily.

2. The number of red roses represent show much you give in a relationship, while the number of white represents what you expect in return.

3. This question represents your attitude towards handling relationship problems. You like to get the person yourself--you are a more direct person and like to work out problems immediately. You asked the family member to get your significant other--you like to avoid problems and hope that theywill solve themselves.

4. The placement of the roses determines how much you like to see your boy/girlfriend. You want to place the roses on the bed--you like to see him/her a lot. You want to place the roses by the window sill--you are alright with not seeing him/her much.

5. This represents your attitude towardshis/her personality. You prefer the person to be asleep--you love theperson as the way she/he is. You prefer the person to be awake--you expect the person to change for you.

6. The road to home tells how long you stay in love with someone. You chose the longer road--you will tend to stay in love for a long time. You chose the short road--you fall out of love easily.

===================================================================

took frm wanting's blog... hai~ dere's no use da lar... so freakin idiotic... its seemed tad dere's nutin ter spur me on in my life... i felt bored n tired of my life... i hate da wae i'm livin'...

KILL ME!!! PLS SUMONE!!!

so shuai

2005-08-11T16:19:00.000+08:00

2dae got soccer interclass my class lost 13-2 to IT... so freakin pathetic... hai~ ya... den HM-CR... 3-3.. GR-BN is 5-4.. GR won... EP-JT 3-6.. JT win... haha... so farnie lo... the BN-GR match... weijun kena zham by marv... haha... at de dere summore... haha... so farnie... but marv veh vulgar... he point middle finger at his goal keeper when he let in a goal... so freakin vulgar...

i tell u arh... delbert is freakin bias... he wont lend me his umbrella.. cuz its raining... idiot... den he lend marv da umbrella.. bias freak... wah... den dey keep jisiaoing me... marv here marv dere... freak man...

idiot KHOR YONG KEONG... he wanted to pass de ball back frm the field dere... den hit me... stoopid... idiot boi... i realli hate him...

but de nicest match was CR-HM... haha... yong keong wen tin onli scored 2... buit weikeong hai~ he lose his standard... denis played,junwei,peizhi,wenyan.. ya... den hm got donglin,binghan,philip.. GR hav marv,junyi dula and a goalkey.. BN got norman, aaron,jeffery,weijun..yinzhi and so on... haha...

ya... he so shuai... his goals todae oso damn shuai... hai~ so nice... hehe...

2005-08-10T18:46:00.000+08:00

i want to rebuke tad star!!!!

hey gurl... EP-GR win cuz U ppl walk OVA... MY CLASS KENA WALK OVA... bunch of CRUEL ppl... u guys force us to hav a game wif u... we juz finished a match lyk 2daes be4... it UNFAIR... on tad dae... got ppl SICK n INJURIED frm my class lor... HALO... dun u ppl hav a sense of respect!!! dont u feel GUILTY tad u din win wif PRIDE... U PPL JUZ SUX... realli....
====================================================================

dere one person out dere... hu is a christian... but sum how she insults other ppl's religion.... hey... even thou i m a christian too but... insulting other ppl's religion is such a childish act...
din god sae we muz respect each other... yet wad the hell r u doing... do u mean being a christian means u r superior to the others... i dun tink so... everyone is equal...so stop ur stoopid and bias comments... stop making urself GREAT... cuz u ARENT...
since u r so bias... den i dun tink u r even FIT TO BE A CHRISTIAN... by insulting others means SATAN is doing his great works tru u... repent... my fellow sista... change ur attitude towards everyone... cuz dere r ppl callin u BITCH wifout u noeing... so pls... stop ur nonsense!!!

===================================================================

i realli get sick n tired of living in tis world... its getting more n more meaningless as the daes past... realli... nuthin in the world is tad meaningful now... y m i still living wif such misery...
can i juz die da nxt dae... pls... GOD pls take my away... i realli hate the life i m living...

so shuai

2005-08-05T18:40:00.000+08:00

he is so shuai... oh my goodness... arh.. so handsome... his tou lan is so nice... veh long nva see ler... i so happi... haha..

i saw him tis morning... aft flag raising... me n jasmine were walkin lar... den... wah... he was tokin to sumone la... den ya... he looked in my direction n i too looked in his... but dun tink he was lookin at erm... ya... wad the hell is so...er... dunno how to sae... but ya... so shuai... hehe... aniwae... den went to klass lo... the lessons r so freakin borin... but wad kept me alive was god n him... haha.. ya...

den aft sch suppose to go self study wif stoopid zer... but ya... she went wif keong.. jolene.. n chessia to parkwae n her hse... cuz keong wan to seduce her maid n jolene wan to see her dog...haha... looks lyk keong n jolene's relationship is not simple..

ya... den i went fer the zuo wen jie li sai... den aft tad went to the bball court to find kahhui... den saw him... haha... so shuai can... he look so cute.. ya... den saw javin, aurick, jiaxi, xiao hang, guanjie,zhihao,weiqi,sam,minli n ppl lar... ya... his skills are freakin good la... again he was lookin in my direction n i too looked at his...

den went up to class to look fer suwen,rek,kuat,BIG assets(grace tan), jasmine.... haha.. den me,jas,suwen,kuat n rek walk out 2gether... haahaaa... den when we walked to the letterbox dere... den i saw mr tan den i shouted to him... haha... su wen too... den guess he saw we were going back wif rek n kuat.. aniwae... ya... tad stoopid rek go n call marv.... idiot shit...

one yr n 3 mths

2005-08-04T18:52:00.000+08:00

its been 1 year n 3 mths ler... hai~ still i dun understand exactly wad is happening... do u actualli see me exist in ur eyes... its seems tad i m a person hu duznt exist... wad m i exactly to u... i m juz a stranger... i tot we had i wunderful tym 2gether??? memories we spent n had??? where hav dey all gone.. hav u ferget dem??? werent dey memorable??? i still carn let go the bits n pieces of dem...

wad exactly is happening??? rek n zer is tellin me tad yes... but... ur actions juz duznt match the words dey spoke... hai~ i carn seem ter ferget the smile on ur face... the voice of urs... the actions... the wae u play basketball n soccer... the wae u walk... its juz un-eraserable... seemed to have carved on the walls of my brain n heart...

i realli missed da daes we spent 2gether... the daes where we played lyk mad... where hav dese daes gone... i realli missed dem... when can i hav dem back into my lyf again... when can we start to tok again... be lyk wad we used to be.. i carn stand the coldness between us... but i noe... i tink u dun wish to even speak to me... so wad's the use of me makin a useless wish... its juz too late to tok abt tis ler... i noe.. now tad u dun wish to tok... its alrite... perhaps i shld keep eberyting to myself..

all the pain i went tru u'll nva understand... the amt of tears i cried u'll nva noe... the depressing period i went tru u'll nva noe... i realli hope tad u can read tis.. but do u even giv a damn abt me??? mostly lykly the ans is NO.. all tis is not wad hurt me the most... wad actualli hurt me is actualli the tone u used when u msg me... the wae u actualli spoke.. it reaali hurt me... cuz at tad time i noe u wont giv a damn abt me animore... u aint the person hu wuld protect me animore... now i stand ALONE in the dark.. in the rain... all by myself... i realli hope all tis is a dream.. i hopre the rain water culd wake me up... but its seems impossible...

~~~missing the daes~~~~
duu u noe tad i actualli luv u... not ur bez fwen... guess u dun giv a damn...

bball n soccer

2005-08-01T19:10:00.000+08:00

2dae hav a bball match wif MD... we won dem wif a score of 22-21... sian... ya... den sprained my fingers... veh pain lor... bt still hav to do bloggin cuz... its realli impt... haha... ya... aft bball... went to watch inter-class soccer... den CR n BN draw...

CR got: weikeong, denis, yuguang, wenyan, junwei, peizhi
BN got: Norman, jerome, aaron, kenneth, weijun, jeffery

ya... den dey draw 5-5... CR veh qiang lo... dey si er fu sheng... actualli 5-2... dey losing de... den junwei, denis, keong score... hai~ den norman almost get into a fight wif junwei... aft de match jerome n norman damn pissed off wif the referee, weijun... haha... well its juz a match onlie... norman kan kai yi dian...

den... ya... stoopid gor, marv... so damn GAY lar he go lie on jeffery's legs... OMG... so freaking gay... carn believe i actualli hav such a gor... aniwae... ya... aft the match wyn's mum cum fetch her... den me n grace go up class to take emaths text... den cum out tad time.. at the bench near the gate saw marv... sitting dere... erm... shld be waiting fer his mum ba... ya.. den me n grace walk out lo...

den reach bubble tea shp... saw yin zhi, norman, denis, junwei, jerome, yuguang n ppl... den grace start to tok abt yuguang's ex-stead in pri sch...he damn bad lehz.. sae... his eye put on stamp.. carn believe he lyk his ex-stead... cuz she is plump n short... so bad lo... hai~

tad's all... my finger is freakin pain... gotta stop...

"wunderful"daes

2005-07-29T19:03:00.000+08:00

2dae... morning aft flag raising... stoopid idiot yuguang go n hai wo... he n zer jisiao me wif marv... marv is near lo plus dere r so mani ppl... freak dem larz...

haha... got punish by soon fer standin outside class b4 yazeed's lesson... lame shit... 50 SQUATS!!! WTH man...freak... hai~ wad eva... ya... so me n huan yuet do squats outside cr n fg... haha... stupid soon made my muscle ache worse... hai~ i carn do full squats... den he purposely ask me to do... den... ask me n huan yuet to fold down our skirts... sianz... dere's sumting rong wif soon's eyes or he purposely let me off... he actualli din see my coloured ankle socks.. 3 EAR HOLES on my left ear... imitation of sch name tag... n nva tuck in my shirt... haha... guess he cock eye...

den me n zer went to east coast larz... SELF- STUDY guai a not??? haha...muz be proud of me rite??? dear shern n my heavenly father... haha... well i find tad... i becum bad to worse... haha... juz realised tad... cuz 2dae got caught by soon... haha... well perhaps i m not the ms obedient animore... haha... well tink tad i m gettin more n more rebellious... haha... will u ppl accept the new me??? haha...

well zer told me sumting abt mr green man todae... hai~ i dun wan to tok abt it... its so sick... hai~ den zer tok cock abt mr green man's gd fwen... idiot!!!

26/7
ya... i realli deproved frm last yrs 2.4km standard... sianz... i actualli drop 2 (14:11) sian sia... guess cuz i walk??? haha... cuz i walked frm the backgate dustbin to the start of goodman rd... haha... dunno...

27/7
i went down wif jas n wen to cheer ppl... haha... i was actualli dere to cheer fer wan ting n ppl.. well we saw alvin teo n his fwens dere... den su wen saw tad alvin's pants split... haha.. got one big hole den can see his light BLUE underwear... if not fer suwen i wuldnt hav noe... cuz i m not so bian tai to go n look at guy's DERE...

den... ya... went to cheer ppl at the small gate near volleyball court... haha... ya... saw bert.. cai.. marv.. wan ting.. jo.. shining.. yeeteng.. blarblar... ya... when da stupid suwen... saw marv... she jisiao me sae i'm marv's gf??? diaoz... den when i stand at the gate tad time... i saw cai n bert 1st... den i saw him... den its damn shit lar he look at me n i look at him.. den i quickly go to der endin point to cheer fer bert my good didi... haha... sound to childish... but ya... den me n cai cum back tad time i gav dem water... i so bad lar... nva giv him water... hai~ dunno wad's rong wif me... hai~ den i went to fill water cuz my water bottle no water ler... den when i went back tad time... saw him walkin towards the water cooler... shit man... hai~ den tok to alvin lek instead of him.. so sad...

28/7
stoopid zer... hai wo... watde lar... tell the whole class i lyk marv... shit larz wadde... wah... den su wen started to call me mrs See... sian... wadde.. shit larz... i dun lyk the name... i m not mrs SEE... pls... i m MS LOK ok??? dun anihow giv me names... den dey keep makin fun of me... wadde... stoopid... haha... den derek is so wad lo... he wan to throw a CHAIR at me cuz i sae he n suwen together and i sae he protect suwen frm being critisised by us .. bias rite??? idiot boi... cuz of a new fwen den he ferget his old fwen... hai~ wu yao ke jiu...

den at nite... me n zer tok on the fone... den we started to tok abt the past... shit man... onli make me depressed... ya.. its too late alreadie... realli too late... everyting carn be back lyk the past... hai~ its too late... but.. y is he givin me hope every now n den... every here n dere... wad duz he actualli wan?? i mean if he wan to draw the line between us... den leave 1/4 undrawn out of the 4 parts of line he wan to draw... hai~ zer sae he lyk me b4.. rek oso... but... still..dere's onli one sae frm zer... cuz rek is unable to giv evidence... hai~ sian... dere's nuthin i can do... zer told me tad he is donin becuz of mr green man... but... hai~ duz he noe he is not the holi one tad save everyone in tis triangle frm pain n misery... but... he is hurtin all of us.. (if zer is speakin the truth) wad exactly duz he wan... stop givin me hopes when he dun even wan to tok to me... it is juz too much fer me to bear...
===================================================================

to him:
pls tell me wad exactly do u wan??? pls be more 干脆.. i carn stand it ler... if u realli wan to draw a line betwwen us den make it CLEAR!!!

to zer:
culd u help me??? both mr grren man n teddy bear.. i realli carn stand it animore!!!

to wyn:
no sweat abt mr soon..

to derek:
u stoopid boi refuse to listen.. dun believe... u wait n see...

to shern:
thx shepherd!!! u're the bez!!!

to wenjie:
great brudder... haha... dun b so depressed k???

to yong yeh:
eh.. stop shouting into my ear when u wan to tok to the cher... lolz

to amos:
u idiot noodle... stop calling me fishball...
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

dere r sumtings in 3fg wich i carn stand... y r dere hypocrites n backstabbers in our klass??? hai~ i hate dem... aint we suppose to be united??? to understand each other??? well sum ******* juz carn stand dem... tink dey r so great... walking wif air... wadde hell... onlie tok to ppl when u need tings n stuff... u're such an ass... i dun sae duznt mean i allow u to b lyk tad...

2ending my mini life...

2005-07-17T16:05:00.000+08:00

i'm sick n tired of the wae i live my life... i dun wish to live animore... hai~ its so damn shit...
i'm disappointed in myself and in sum ppl... hai~ im in damn shit... i hate myself...

y do i hav to be myself... feel lyk ending my life... but... i carn... i haven yet to prove to God.. i'm feeling terrible... the feeling is frm within... inside me... sumting tad i carn take away... sumting i carn forget... wad the hell is happening to me... its seems to me tad i'm wasting my life away... doing stoopid stuffs..

wad shld i do... i juz carn bring myself to tell anione... i'm in deep shit... now the onli reason fer me to live is God... every ting esle seems meaningless to me... tis feeling no one will understand... as time passed... i've learnt tad no amt of tears is able to bring me out of the misery i'm going thru now...

i'm given up the last bit of hope i hav... my heart hav broken into millions of pieces becuz of sum ppl... i'm disappointed in my parents... so much tad my heart has died... nthing dere is left fer me to live for... except god...

prayer:

Father... help... is tis wad u wan me to overcum... father... y me??? i feel so terrible... father... no matter how much tears i shed its still useless... father can u tell me how can i overcum tis challenge??? father... u hav nv forsake me... father... u're alwaes dere when i needed u... unlike sum ppl... father u hav loved me for hu i m... father... i'm reali sorry to not aknowledge u in front of my buddhist family members hu stood up against u... father even thou i've commit to many sins... u nv forsake me... father derefore i reali hope u'll be wif me to overcum tis challenge... father giv me determination n courage... i pray in jesus name... amen..

shopping fer wyntrice presents

2005-07-13T18:59:00.000+08:00

hai~ todae was so damn sick... shan is crazy todae... he brought a santa hat to sch n wore it... frm the early morning he started to sae "merry christmas" and " tml i'm going to wear a beta hat.. wif lots of bells on it... so tad when i walk and i shake my head lyk tis it'll go jhing jing jing jing" stupid shit wad a waste of time... he hat got conficated by ms lum in the end... she told him tad christmas is 6 mths early...

ya... we are slacking in class... den is lyk... nva hear wad the chers are toking abt... ya... den during pe lesson... i nva run... i tink my stamina is deproving... i now run lyk sai... haha... ya... but oso bcuz i walk marz... haha... so i reach the ending point wif wenjie at 16 plus min... haha... deprove lyk siao... haha... ya... den rek was surprised larz... so was shan... haha...

den during recess.. wen jie brought apple rings to sch... den me n rek end up eating mist of dem... haha... cuz we sitting nxt to each other marh...(he sat on wyn's chair) haha... ya...

aft sch... me, qin, amos n wenjie... decided to go TM together to get presents fer wyn... den mr green man came into my class ... i dunno whether is i purposely or not... i ask wen jie if he wan to go alr a not... ya.. den we went lorz... haha... i dunno whether its the rite wae of dealing wif mr green man...

den we took bus 10... saw rui lin... alvin.. concept(is tad how u spell his name???) and sum other guys hum i dunno... oso we saw... zheng hui, jun hao and guang wei... we went TM but... we walk here walk dere oso carn find a suitable present fer her... me, qin, su wen, wenjie, amos, rek n kuat sharing... but dunno wad to get fer her... sian... haha... den in de end... we bought a voodoo doll plus sumting else tml aft we watch movie... haha... amos sae war of the worlds is a crap movie... but i wan to watch... haha... ya den went hm wif wenjie on the mrt... den he ask me hu i lyk... den i told him leh loz... hai~ more ppl get to noe ler... sianz... aniwae it wont happen de lar... but stupid wenjie keep saeing tad me n him got resemblance.. siao wheregot lorz...sae we look a like... siao... ya... den he oso tell me tad... ******** lyk bryan before... ya... knew it long ago by my super intuition... not surprise...

ya... waiting fer daryl's reply c if he is going to church tis sat... i most lykly going tis sat or nxt sat... haha...

YTD
me, su wen, lion, JT, rek, amos n jun hao were playing volleyball wif sec 1s and sec 4s aft our chi remedial... haha... sec 1 got my pri sch junior... n sec 4 is yong teck and sum volleyballers... haha... dunno deir name... well... den dere... saw mr teddy bear training... stupid... dun wish to c him tad time he appear... ya.. den he keep walking here n dere... haha... lyk sum crazy ppl... den his stupid junior shouted his damn name... freak... i dun lyk to hear his name... argg...carn stand it... haha...den me, lion, suwen, sam, jas, rek, shan, amos, JT and jun hao walk out cuz raining n its running late... haha... den me, lion n suwen juz cut the bball court lyk tad.. heck dem larz... aniwae monster coach is toking to dem wad...

den suwen, me, lion n rek took the same bus... suwen ask me n lion to accompany her to take 155... siao so damn long lor.. den me n lion ask rek to accompany her... he dun wan... she oso dun wan... ah yo... lao gong lau po le hai xiu she me??? haha... ya... juz got tad feeling tad dey r 2gether... hu noes... onli god duz... n dey noe...

2005-07-12T18:00:00.000+08:00

So long nva blog ler...

hai~
seems tad the world hav changed... ya.. haha... get to noe god even better fer the past few weeks... ya... he appeared in my life... he changed me... into a better person... one tad noe him betta... ya... i sudden realised tad all the EVIL tings i've done in the pass is lyk... not making him proud... ya... so i'm trying to be hsi reflector n make him proud...but i dun tink he is proud of me yet... cuz i still m disappointing him...

ya... i was suppose to ferget n not care or even curious of wad he is doing.. wad he is tinkin.. n stuff... but hai~ i'm juz disappointed in myself... neva hav i been such a failure... frm lyk last year... i sae i wana ferget him... but until now??? wad happen... its still him tad appears on my mind... freak it lorz... hai~ y is it so... i wanted even get his attention... freak it... i m suppose to change the mentality i m having now... i told myself not to care animore... focus on god... but sumhow the picture of him juz find its wae into my life.. i realli dunno wad to do ler...

juz ytd... aftnn... during lunch break... got one girl wan to commit suicide... siao one lorz... wad der hell... juz cuz of a guy she lyk tad... if she jumped down... den i wuld hav jump down so many thousand times... y let sumting lyk tad over rule the love tad god gav us... god is realli Great... he pulled my tru an ordeal... been dere fer me in my darkest hours... neva left me alone to face all the temptations n depressed times... he was even dere to share my happiness... if by commit suicide can solve all problems... i wuld hav jump long ago... i wont even hav been here now bloggin... ya... but... i inflicted pain on myself... i used a scissors n pen knife to cut myself.. but... i've learnt.. by bleeding ur pain wont go off... by dying ur problems are still left dere unsolve... y not try to face it n overcome it...

fergiving sumone is not easy yet not difficult... in the past i owaes hate tis guy hu is big mouth... ya... he spread alot of tings arund... but... still... he was not tad bad lar... i juz... dun lyk him spreading so much rumours... trying to get attention... ya... but still... now i dun hate him not lyk him... juz neutral... nva tok... haha... juz lyk my gor... we became distant... so sad... wad to do...

muz pia fer my EOY ler... my results kena sai...

aim to get into
1) VJC }impossible
2) TJC (tamasek) }impossible
3) SINGAPORE POLYTECHNIC ( most lykly going dere... haha... my fwens n cuzins r dere)
4) CATHOLIC JC
5) MERIDIAN JC

dun tink can make it into any JCs... maybe not even serangoon or tampines... haha... i feel demoralize by my marks...

L1R5------- 26
L1R4------- 20

dunno how...

2005-06-07T10:31:00.000+08:00

details of camp!!!!

day1
reach csmp abt 2.. den when me n wyn walk in tad time we saw tis crazy guy... waved lyk a gay and shouted "ting ting" omgdness... so yuck... den he a bit siao siao larz... blow the damn whistle of his... is lyk how the football fans cheer fer the football team lyk tad... so noisy... den went to the multi-purpose hall(mph) to gather... den got to noe the instructors... i was damn surprise to hear the name... Instructor marvin... omg... its damn farnie larz... he act gay the 1st time we saw him... his action damn niang... juz lyk pok pok(jeng khit)... yup... den went to play the "ice-breaker game" den at nite aft dinner hav tis nite activity... sumting to do wit candles der... sec3 hav tis debrief abt the belaying... sian... instructor jeremy, ping wei n ruddy asked us to try out... cuz the nxt day we hav to belay the sec2 in the high rope area... den the sec3 ppl veh late den slp... carn slp i guess... so we played dai di... haha..

day2
woke up at 6.15 by the noise the sec2 make... hai~ so damn noisy... sian... den went to gather at the mph... cuz instructor marvin keep pacing all the campers... jeremy is doing all the tokin... haha... ppl dun respond to him unless he do it the niang way... so farnie... den we to the high rope area... saw instructor kelvin n jason... both of dem is lyk shit lorz... esp the kelvin... keep finding fault wif all the sec3... call n call again... he can be nice but also veh mean... haha... his action veh farnie de lehz... a bit gayish.. may be is cuz he cum out frm laselle SIA... haha... but carn be... jeremy oso... dunno larz... my grp was the slowest grp to finish 1 damn element... freak man... den went to hav lunch... haha... den... saw the stoopid marvin took a whole lot of rice... lyk mountain lyk tad... omg... we all larf at him... his reaction is lyk keong lyk tad... so farnie.. ya... den i climbed the rock wall... den see the instructors play the suicide ting...so we did high rope fer the whole day... den at nite aft dinner... we play "kidnap'... the game made us run all round... sian... aft the game we hav supper... den we had a chat wif the instructors... haha... told marvin tad ppl sae he hav PMS... he veh thick in the head sia.. dun even noe wad is PMS... den we tok wif the other instructors...found out tad fraddy lyk tis gurl called mun ting... haha... ya... den found out tad yixiang is not as cold-blooded as wad dey saw... he can be quite farn... both of us went to touch the cat tad jiali was scared of... haha... instructor ruddy feed the cat n spoke malay to it... so wierd... den cuz of the belaying... jiali n sheeting got injuries.. haha.. den jeremy accidentally bent jiali finger while lookin... den she cry... haha... he got shocked... den... der instructors oso noe tad jiali is scared of cats... cuz dere's cat movin arund... den jiali wan to get away frm dem... so she oso run arund... haha... dunno is the cat scared of her or vice-versa... haha den we went to slp... we slept early tad dae...

day3
woke up by the sec2 again... burt today we veh late... haha... aft washing up... saw marvin sitting outside the gal's toilet bench day-dreaming... haha... tad toilet is veh smelly yet he still can sit dere... pei fu pei fu... haha... den... while we are keeping our stuff... heard his voice shouting AGAIN... his voice is booming loud... den we had kayaking aft lunch... haha... den wyn n mi n sum sec3 chase ms teo n ms boo.. stoopid sia... cuz stoodens r nort suppose to go out of the boundary... dey purposely go dere... den we carn chase dem... stoopid... den the stoopid instructor bruce bully us... he purposely spray water at us using the oar while we were in the kayak... wah lao... so evil lorz... den we played a game where all the ppl join deir kayaks side by side.. den the ppl of the 1st n last kayaks hav to change kayak by walkin onto other ppl's kayak...veh kong bu.. den he n pei zhi trick us... dey ask us to lie back in the water... den close our eyes... den dey start to spray water at us... haha... den aft our grp is marvin's grp... haha... den is lyk... so farnie... haha... juz lyk two person askin "wad" in a distance where no matter how loud dey speak oso culdnt hear der action... is damn diaozz.. aft kayakin we hav low elements... ya den we change shirt but carn bathe yet... so its lyk... shirt n shorts dry... but the underwear is wet...den we hav campfire... yup... got one instructor dunno his name... he went to sabo keong to be the chung cheng idol..keong was asked to strip in front of the ppl by the sec2s... haha... bruce, colin, phin siew, xiao xin and sum other ppl oso got nominated... but in teh end a guy lyk seng chuan won... -_-.. oh ya... got to noe tad phin siew n zhi hao together... den the fraddy started to sing again... yuck... out of tune der... haha... den we dance frenship dance... ya... den went to slp...

day4
last dae ler abit sad... wake up n hear marvin's voice again aft washin up... den we had breakfast n the sec 2 start to do mass area cleaning... haha... sian sec3 dunnit to do... hehe... we are the supervisors... onlie sum sec3 stoopid go n help dem... lyk yi xiang n jun hong... haha... den me, kah hui, jin tian, wyn n xuan ying went to the bunks dere... den saw ping wei n his grp dere... den we tok to dem... den ping wei teach us the yipee yar yar tingy... haha... so fun... den time to leave... so sad sia... hai~ den we hug pei zhi goodbye... n den... cheer fer peizhi... den marvin's grp nxt to us... den deir grp cheer fer him the north south east west cheer... so er xin... den we gav dem a merlion clap(vomit)... haha... den took pic of fraddy, peizhi n ping wei... haha...as momento... haha...

cheers we learnt

wo de shou bi you zhi lao shu
ni der zhi hui zhang zai pi gu
muscle muscle jiu shi li liang
muscle muscle jiu shi li liang
hungry hungry
very very
hungry very
very hungry
ji ge lar ka bi ya bi ya
ji ge lar ka bi ya bi ya
jia (hokkien means eat)

pics of instructors

instructor marvin n his fren

instructor ping wei

instructor peizhi n fraddy

2005-06-06T13:45:00.000+08:00

tired... juz came back frm the jalan bahtera campsite... veh veh nice... so nice sia... all the instructors veh veh der nice... burt dey are veh lame... is realli diao lorz... hai~ i will realli miss dem... sian... so fast cum back hm... muz start mugging ler... hai~

haha... wif the past 4D 3N wif the instructors... i realli enjoyed deir company.. althou we sec 3 do sai gang jobs... but its fun... haha...

intro of the instructors:

instructor jeremy:
one BHB person.. dam lame... haha... IC fer the whole camp... veh nice to the sec 3... go out to buy us drinks and tidbits... damn farnie de lor him... tis was his 1st tym organising the camp... haha... burt he is veh good larz... veh caring... ah ya... juz nice larz... dun believe can ask ani sec 3 and 2... easy to tok to... haha.. self-proclaimed NO. 1 handsome in the camp... bleagh... he is oso a councilor... pro rite???

instructor kenny:
another lame person... whu shee ting sae he look lyk bryan... erm... k lar... a lil bit larz... haha... he oso veh nice... when we sae we hungry... he go bring us food... haha... althou the food is biscuit and bread... haha... well he can be veh evil oso... haha... cuz he is one of the game master... den he refuse to giv clue to the grps... sianz... haha... one of jeremy's assistant...

instructor marvin:
1st dae heard his name arh got scared... one guy wif PMS... haha... realli... cuz he can actualli larf and crazy wif u fer a whikle den straightaway he veh serious... haha... he is one loud trumpet... when he askin the campers to cheer... he damn de loud... lyk bomb lyk tad... haha... burt he veh farn lehz... althou he nort my grp leader but we still tok... haahaa.. he everyty diao me one... abit siao siao... cuz everytym i see him i'll larf... den he will look at me.. tinkin dere's sumting ring wif me... haha... he is veh farnie larz...1st dae he alr act gay... yuck... cuz he was asked to do the 'ah niang clap'... he oso abit thick in the head... haahaa... dun een noe wad's PMS.. but he nort PMS ler... he is SMS... Serious Menstrual Syndrome...

instructor ping wei:
another siao siao guy.... oso veh lame... but he is a farn guy to be wif... haha... he is damn evil lorz... he go and swing the garbage bag onto my head when he walk past me... idiot guy... his voice damn deep den carn sing high songs... but he keep singing dui mian de nu hai kan guo lai... haha... so farnie... self-proclaimed NO.2 handsome... actualli to sae the truth... he is the most handsome instructor in the camp ler... but horz... he n his other half(freddy) lyk gay lyk tad... yuck... k larz not tad gay larz... but... dey act gay... tink dey r veh good fwens..

instructor fraddy (Freddy the frog[chocolate]):
self-proclaimed no.3 handsome... farnie guy... n veh lame too... he tinks he can sing veh veh well... haha... burt... his singing is juz ok larz... but nort tad good... burt compare to ping wei he is alr veh good ler... he abit erm... siao oso larz... everytime blow his "$15" whistle... he veh proud of it... haha... i find him veh scary... cuz 1st dae we arrive... he came walking out of the gate calling "ting ting" he wave somemore... i thot he gone mad... haha... but he is a veh farnie guy larz... veh creative... he lyk jiao sum gals oso... lyk jin tian.. haha... he sang songs (love songs) to her... walk near her... sit nxt to her...even giv tings to her... haha... cuz jin tian at 1st dunno freddy.. she find him cut so she ask ping wei wad is his name... den frm dere rumour start... he hav a jackie chan nose... haahaa... he even look lyk di qiang...

instructor ruddy:
haha... a malay guy... veh farnie n lame... burt he lyks to do tings tad ppl carn tink of... every nite the sec3 see him... his top onlie wear a jacket... den he zip onlie half wae.. so disgusting... din realli noe him... so nuthin else to sae...

instructor bruce:
haha... a big sized guy whu look lyk malay cuz of his tan... haha... but he is a pure chinese.... haha... he veh farnie... he lyk to do stoopid tings to make us larf.... he is oso a big bully... juz cuz he noe how to kayak... burt he is a nice person...

instructor zul:
he is a macho man... haha... tad's wad dey call him... is grp call him papasan.. ppl mamasan he papasan... sianz... he is the instructor of colin n chee siang's grp... haha.... dey larf when deir instructor was asked to do the sexy frog dance... haha...

instructor peizi:
my grp der... haahaa... veh nice gal... looks aft her grp as thou she is the mother lookin aft her chicks...

dese r sum of the instructors i noe...
too tired ler... wan to slp... cont soon..

i m going to miss dem... hai~... luv to kayak... yay...kayakin rox...

meanin of lurv

2005-05-30T11:29:00.000+08:00

for all you people who say, "I love you"
when youhave no clue what love is exactly!

something to ponder on..

are your palms sweaty,
is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest
when sum1 sae "i lurv u"?
that isn't love,that's LIKE.

can't keep your eyes or hands off her/him?
that isn't love,that's LUST.

proud,and eager to show her/him off?
that isn't love,that's LUCK.

want her/him because you know she's/he's there?
that isn't love,that's LONELINESS.

be with her/him because it's what everyone wants?
that isn't love,that's LOYALTY.

be with her/him because she/he kissed you,
or held your hand?
that isn't love,that's LOW SELF-ESTEEM.

stay for her/his confessions of love,
because you don't want to hurt her/him?
that isn't love,that's PITY.

belong to her/him because the sight of her/him
makes your heart skip a beat?
that isn't love,that's INFATUATION.

pardon her/his faults because you care about her/him?
that isn't love,that's FRIENDSHIP.

tell her/him every day she/he is the only one you think of?
that isn't love,that's a LIE.

willing to give up all of your favorite things for her/his sake?
that isn't love,that's CHARITY.

=====================================

if your heart aches and breaks when she's/he's sad,
then it's LOVE.

if you cry for her/his pain,
even when she's/he's strong,
then it's LOVE.

if her/his eyes see your true heart,
and touches your soul so deeply it hurts,
then it's LOVE.

if you stay because a blinding,
incomprehensible mix of pain
and relation pulls you close
and holds you to her/him,
then it's LOVE.

if you accept her/his faults because
it's a part ofwho she/he is,
then it's LOVE.

if you're attracted to others,
but stay with her/him faithfully without regrets,
then it's LOVE.

if you would give her/him your heart,
your life and your death?
then it's LOVE.now,

if love is painful,and tortures us so,
why dowe love?
why is it LOVE that we search for in life?
this pain,this agony?
why is it all we long for?
this torture,this powerful death of self?
why?
the answer is so simple.
cos it's..LOVE.
it is such an addictive thing that
even people who are not having it
wish to experience it and share it with others as well.

==========================================================

yay.. goin fer oac soon... yay.. got kayakin... haha.. its juz so unfair tad we didnt hav tad last year.. well at least we get to try tis year... haha... burt its goin to hav less fun... cuz all the fun ppl last year aint going... den wif all the seniors gone.. its juz less fun... hai~
got caught cheatin when playin billiard... hai~ tad ezone staff is damn demanding... rude n irritating... feel lyk punchin her... fu*k man...idiot as*hole.. arggg... nv giv 1st warning cum n tok cock wif us... den wan ter call police summore... wadthehell.. feel lyk callin her a booch..fu*k..

kingdom of heaven

2005-05-23T16:31:00.000+08:00

todae saw chunkiat at Tampines mall playing at the arcade... shld be him lar... den ate ramen... den watch kingdom of heaven... woah... damn nice larz... burt veh gruesome... when the knight slash the throat of the men... so disgustin... the blood gushed out of the throat... yuck... cuz the men kena slash... den... cannot swallow saliva... den... got tis disgustin sound of the saliva... yuck... is damn yuck... dun wana sae ler... wan to vomit... den... dey oso anihow chop of ppl head... olando bloom juz break sumone's neck by steppin on the man's head... yuck... so erm... den can hear the head crack.. der king of jerusalem got a disease veh disgustin... his flesh rot yuck... actualli he wanted to let olando bloom take over the throne... but he dun wan... hai~ so noble...

den aft the show saw alvin lek n his scoutmates... yup... hai~ still unable to shake away his shadow... sian... tml got bball... aft sch... hai~ i noe he wont be dere... i realli reali dunno wad to do ler... zer duznt wan ter help me by givin his bad points... stoopid woman... at least giv me a reason fer it... burt... i can get nuthin... realli veh... hai~ dun wana sae ler... sickening...

aniwae goin OAC... haha... keong, zhihao, yuguang, chest, ting, jelly, lion n wyn is goin... haha... can chen ji siao the sec2s... haha... lyk jing ya... kimberly, colin n sum other ppl larz... haha... dey r dead...

tears

2005-05-13T15:16:00.000+08:00

tears
if a girl cries in front of yu,
it means,
that she cant take it anymore.

if yu take her hand,
she wud stay wiv yu;
for the rest of yor life.

if yu let her go,
it wil be hard for her
to go back to being herself
wiv yu once agn.

a girl wont cry easily;
except in front of the person
whom she loves the most,
she becomes weak.

a girl wont cry easily;
only when she loves yu the most,
she puts down her ego.

guys;
if a girl cries bcus of yu,
pls hold her hands firmly,
cus she's the one who's willg to stay wiv yu
for the rest of yor life.

guys;
if a girl cries bcus of yu,
pls dont give her up.
mayb bcus of yor decision,
yu'l ruin her life.

when she cries right in front of yu,
when she cries bcus of yu,
look into her eyes.
can yu see &feel the pain &hurt she's feelg?

think.
which other girl has cried wiv pure sincerity,
in front of yu,
and bcus of yu?

she cries,
not bcus she's weak.
she cries,
not bcus she wants sympathy or pity.

she cries,
bcus cryg silently
is no longer possible;
the pain, hurt &
agony have bcome too big a burden
to be kept inside.

guys,
think abt it.
if a girl cries her heart out to yu,
and al bcus of yu,
its time to look back on whut yu've done.

only yu,
wil knw the answer to it.
do consider it.
cus one day,
it may be too late for regrets.
it may be too late,to say, " i'm sry .. "

2005-05-11T14:17:00.000+08:00

todae mornin' i had a veh wierd dream...
i was walkin up the stairs... he n another guy was behind me... den he suddenly speed up... den we sort of walked up the stairs together... i was damn wierd larz... cuz its lyk walkin side by side... den aft... got tis gatherin in the MACs... den my back was facin the glass... den i saw him standin outside... dunno y... haiya... the dreams i had was damn wierd larz... dun seem to make any sense... besides... i thot thru fer so long... i decided tad i shld nort hav ani high hopes lerz... thot tad i shld realli start concentratin on other tings... however it duz not mean tad i dun lyk him... its juz tad... i learn how to let go of tings and understand... sumtings juz culd not be held onto... no matter how much effort u put in... sumtime we hav to let go of the past so tad its not so miserable...

wad happens in the future... its lyk a complete blank to me...
frm now on
i shld not shed animore tears fer him...
i will not do tings to get his attention...

i will let go of the past tad we had together...
i will hav to make it clear to myself tad he duznt care... derefore... i shld do der same to him...

he was wad i longed for... dreamt abt... proud of... burt now... he is goin to be the memory tad i cherish... n keep at the deepest end of my heart... soul n mind...

a heart broken n nva mend

2005-05-06T16:16:00.000+08:00

hai tun wan lian ren...
y did dada hav to hurt xiao ping gai... y did he hav to be so good to her all the tym be dere fer her at her saddest moments n suddenlie hurt her??? y??? dun he luv her???
y did everyting dreamt of cum at inappropriate tym??? y did xiao gang sae he lyk tian bian when he hav alreadie stab her in the heart... since tian bian was hurt by zeya... n she lyk xiao gang b4... y carn she juz let go of the childhood promise dada n xiao ping gai made n lyk xiao gang once more???

====================================================================

hai~ watch hai tun wan lian ren i so damn... hai~ reminded me of sumting tad i dun wish to ponder animore... y carn i let go of the damn teddie when he had hurt me so many times... the wae he hurt me is not juz a minor scratch... but a million of knife stabbing my heart... y did he haf ter lie?? dere were times we shared nice n good memories... i reallie reallie felt happie... burt... i did not cherish the moments... now tad i wander back into my memories... i reallie reallie regret... burt no point regrettin... cuz... time cannot turn back... perhaps its juz wad GOD wans me 2 rmb 4 the rest of my life... maybe my existence was nva once important in his life... may be i m juz a small n minor character in his life... he nva cared!!!
i nva felt as lost b4... onlie him... i dun care wad others sae abt me... burt... its him n his words tad hurt me the most... frm my frens i heard wad names he call me... wad he said abt me... wad did i do to deserve all tis shit frm him... i wan to stop caring... stop luvin him... stop thinkin abt him... aft all he had done to me... but i juz carn... juz carn... he appeared every single day of my life in my thots... sumtimes in teh nite... tears juz flowed incontrollably... i dunno y... sumtyms i tell myself he juz duznt worth my tears... burt in the end still... i... hai~

now tad i had pox... i tink he din even realise tad i was not in sch... i din wan to be so jian to tell him tad i had pox so tad i get sum care frm him... i dun wan... i dun wan his sympathy... juz as wad i said... i nva was important in his life... he nva notice me... all he was juz the ppl arund him... burt not the person at the back... hai~ dun wish to cont further... it juz hurts me too too much...

chicken pox

2005-05-03T14:09:00.000+08:00

2nd attack of the chicken pox in my life... woah... veh xing ku... so itchy here... dere... almost everywhere... hai~ so troublesome... all cuz of my brudder... spread it to me... shit larz... at home got nuthin 2 do... so boring... den the exams i may not nid ter take... hehe... i noe how to choose the dates fer my chicken pox... i clever rite??? haha...

well... i told zer ytd tad... even if i die he wuldnt even care... zer sae he duz... burt... frm my point of view... its nort wad she sae... hai~ well... i juz dun lyk ppl lying to me...

well... 2dae... receive a quite a few msges... so an wei... hehe... i realli thanked god fer tis ppl... haha...

well...

since he duznt care den y shld i???

2005-05-01T17:48:00.000+08:00

long time since i blogged... hai~ manie tings haf happen... chantelle n rek r 2gether... as a matter of fact... wenjie is troubled cuz of jasmine... wyn n her ep guy... yong yeh n his clothes well.. dunno larz... everybodie in my klass seem so shi lian... den... hai~ i bcum deir qin su zhe... hai~ everytime tok wif den abt tis kinda stuff onlie reminds me of him... hai~ he wuldnt even care even if i die or not... he treat me as if i m a stranger... i tink i shld stop tinkin abt him... stop wastin my time on him... stop all the nonsense i m goin tru... its lyk dese sufferin wuld nva end... hai~

on fridae... me, bryan, shern, rek n chong decided to walk out 2gether... rek bang seh chantelle... so evil rite?? den chantelle went to her fwen hse cuz he nv accompany her... den concourse got buffet fer ppl hu take part in syf... den bryan go n gop food... wah... 2 servings of bee hoon... siao one lorz... so thick skin de... tan chuen yin n tan sek jiau saw him take summore... he still cont... carn stand him... den saw colin, chee siang, n quite a few ppl... all sec2 frm bball de... den went to take drinks frm the buffet tingy... woah oso buai pai seh one... shern was lyk tokin to chong... den its lyk... bryan abit sad larz... he keep asking me to walk slower... hai~ den aft we reach bubble tea shop... den colin n chee siang dey all came into the bubble tea shop... haha... dey veh farnie... i ask rek to hold fer me my chem bk... cuz i drinkin n eating marhz... den... bus cum ler... den bryan rush out... den rek suddenly sae... bye pei yee... so loudly... i thot its quite wierd... den i rmb cuz my chem bk wif him... haha... den i turn arund n get muai book... den stoopid colin sae... "kuai dian bus yao zhou ler... bu yong na shu ler lar..."(sumting lyk tad)... ji siao... lame shyt sia...

hai~ wad he did and said... the gd n bad time we spent 2gether... kept appearing... i wana ferget... but y dey keep appearing... wad shyt is tis... i realli dislyk the wae my mind works... i told zer my new motto: since he duznt care den y shld i???... den she told me "he duz care lorz..." burt when i ask her to explain she refused to tell me aniting... i had enuf of all dese shyt... fer once i m nort going to believe wad zer sae...

2005-04-20T18:44:00.000+08:00

Here without you by 3 doors down
A hundred days had made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lights had made me colder and I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles had separate
They disappeared now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello
I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go it gets hard but it won't take away my love
And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done
it get hard but it won't take away my love

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
but tonight girl it's only you and me
===================================================================

woah... so sad lor tis song... hai~ 2dae hav shepherding... shern told me n zer abt putting god in the centre of our lives... its quite tru we shuld... cuz he is veh impt... wifout him dere wuld be no mee...i reaali dunno wad to sae larz... hai~

on the bus... me n zer tok abt dem... hai~ well... he confessed to her... as wad i've guessed...
zer ask me to tell him i lyk him b4 another guy do sumting stoopid... burt... i haven tok to him fer lyk 4 mths... cuz he duznt seem to wana hav a chat... hai~ well... i dun hav the courage lehz... i fear tad wad happen last year might happen to me again... i wuld nort be able to take it again... last year was bad enuf alreadie... wich took me 2 whole mths to heal part of the wound inflicted... hai~ i hate the feeling... tad other guy is crazie larz... i tink he did it out of sum rashness... i hope he can wake up frm his dreams... i m sort of scared of him larz... i tink is the ECP tingy tad made me to scared of him... i m afraid to hurt him again... if he hav accident i will be guilt-striken... burt i dun lyk him... the one i lyk is nort him... burt the one hu hurt me... the one who kept a dist frm me cuz of his fwen... i reallie dunno wad to do... zer sae he lyk me too... burt... he tinks i lyk his damn fwen... its impossible lorz... not possible ani more... wads ova is ova... hai~ i realli dunno how to explain it to him... when u hav a person in ur heart alreadie... its impossible to hav another in ur heart... nothing can replace him in ur heart... no one can... he is too impt in ur life tad u're willing ter sacrifice ur life fer him... i m realli afraid tad he will hurt me the wae he did last yr... the feelin is too overwhelming...

2dae walk the 3rd floor outside sci lab dere... met him when i was goin to the hist rm... hai~ den aft lit goin back to klass tad time oso saw him... den stoopid alvin... go flick my head... woah lau... pain lehz... den i chase him... den reach the bridge den i stopped... hai~ dun wish to cont chasin... den stoopid ppl sae got gurl chase alvin... pui.. i den dun wan... den rui ling make fun of me... idiot... hai~ guess he saw him chasin alvin... well... wuld he even care abt me... den y shuld i care... hai~ den aft sch... stoopid amos n derek sang the bananas in pajamas song... "justina is pajamas went tumbling/rolling down the stairs"... den both of dem go call me n wyn army tank... shit dem... den i chase derek... den he went out of the class... juz nice... tai you, wei keong n wen yan were walking along the corridor... den i wanted to run in between wei keong n tai you... but... tai you moved towards wei keong den i run n push him to chase derek... a bit pai seh larz... i mean i dun mean to push him... tink he damn pissed off...den derek ran into the class tru the front door... den i carn stop immediately... den my legs brushed against the wooden door den the the wooden door had jagged edges... den i cut my leg... woah damn pain sia... den wyn n su wen help me catch derek... den i hit him lyk crazy... haha... den amos oso... call army tank again... nv die b4... den me n wyn took chairs n chased aft him... he ran so fast lor... den disappear... idiot...
den i went hm n read the bible... haha... veh glad i choose to be a christian... yay... jesus rawks... oh ya... amos showed me a verse tad time... ferget wad verse n chapter...
erm the verse is tis : all fats is lord... (i tink its lyk tad)

tad's all fer 2dae...

2005-04-17T17:18:00.000+08:00

The story start wif a guy,name Paul anda girl named Ella..
Both of were still students but had already started to 'fall in love'..
in another words, gosteady..

In one of the days during their June holidays which they have been waiting for,
they met each other at a basketball court..
Coincidentally, they started playing a match wif each other.. they had fun..
As Ella knew one of the frens of Paul,
she asked for Paul's number..
At tat time, Paul didn't want to fall in love again,
after getting so much hurt from the previous one..
Sadly, tat fren of Paul didn't give her the number..
As days went by, the holidays ended..
They met each other at another basketball near Ella's skool..

Days went by and Ella borrowed Paul's hp and missed call her own hp to get his number..
Tat very nite, she smsed Paul.. They chatted and had fun..
Till one day, Ella expressed her love for Paul..
Paul loved her much too.. after thinking 4 a long time,
Paul thinks tat he and Ella would last,
thus, asked her if she would be his partner..
Obviously, she agreed..
They went steady for one and a half short mths..
Ella ended the relationship..
with her parents not allowing her to go steady as a reason..
who on earth would accept tat lame reason?
but Paul, like many other love victims, had no choice but to let go..

Years past and another fell in love wif Paul..
She was Mary.. Paul and Ella didn't contact for a very long time..
Paul still loved Ella very much..
but nvr had a chance to tell her..
one day,along a street, Paul was wif Mary..
Paul saw a familiar figure across the road..
guess who was tat? it was Ella..
Paul ran acrossed the road, without noticing a truck coming..
BANG!! everyone near him crowded around tat area..
Mary screamed as she rushed to Paul..
Ella joined in the crowd..
She remembered the face, one who loved her so much in the past..
Next to him, was Mary..
He wasn't dead.. 'dun give up.. say my name, 100 times, 1000 time, a million times..
u're gonna say it till u can finish a million b4 u can stop!!'
Mary said to Paul.. with tears in her eyes..
Everyone thought Mary was Paul's gerl..
Standing at one side, alone,was a gerl crying..
tat's was Ella who regretted breaking up wif Paul,
after recalling how nice Paul treated her in the past..
Paul was sent to the Hospital..Mary and Ella were dere.. Praying hard..
An operation was carried out.. Paul didn't survive..
TheDoctor came out, shaking his head.. Sighed..
He too, thought tatMary was Paul's gerlfren,
thus approached her for an apology for not being able to revive Paul..
He said to Mary: "Miss Ella.. your boyfren didn't survive..
he gave himself up after calling your name 157 times.. im sorry.."
The Doctor has actually mistook Mary for Ella..
Paul was calling out for Ella.. Ella cried in a corner..
She knew why he had stopped at157..
tat was the day she broke wif him..(15/7)
she, who ended the relationship which Paul treasured so much, has in turn, ended Paul's life..

IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE DEEPLY..
NVR LEAVE TAT PERSON.. U'LL NVR NOE WHEN U'LL NEED HIM/HER BACK IN YOUR LIFE AGAIN..
TREASURE YOUR LOVED ONES..
YOU'LL NVR NOE IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP WIF YOUR PARTNER WOULD ACTUALLY MEAN A LIFE TO HIM..
===================================================================
so shwweet rite?? hai~ muz all relationship turn to the dark side???

2005-04-15T19:01:00.000+08:00

Red roses were her favorites, her name was also Rose.
And every year her husband sent them, tied with pretty bows.
The year he died, the roses were delivered to her door.
The card said, "Be my Valentine," like all the years before.
Each year he sent her roses, and the note would always say,
"I love you even more this year, than last year on this day."
"My love for you will always grow, with every passing year."
She knew this was the last time that the roses would appear.
She thought, he ordered roses in advance before this day.
Her loving husband did not know, that he would pass away.
He always liked to do things early, way before the time.
Then, if he got too busy, everything would work out fine.
She trimmed the stems, and placed them in a very special vase.
Then, sat the vase beside the portrait of his smiling face.
She would sit for hours, in her husband's favorite chair.
While staring at his picture, and the roses sitting there.

A year went by, and it was hard to live without her mate.
With loneliness and solitude, that had become her fate.
Then, the very hour, as on Valentines before,
The doorbell rang, and there were roses, sitting by her door.
She brought the roses in, and then just looked at them in shock.
Then, went to get the telephone, to call the florist shop.
The owner answered, and she asked him, if he would explain,
Why would someone do this to her, causing her such pain?
"I know your husband passed away, more than a year ago,
"The owner said, "I knew you'd call, and you would want to know."
"The flowers you received today, were paid for in advance."
"Your husband always planned ahead, he left nothing to chance."
"There is a standing order, that I have on file down here,
And he has paid, well in advance, you'll get them every year.
There also is another thing, that I think you should know,
He wrote a special little card...he did this years ago."
"Then, should ever, I find out that he's no longer here,
That's the card...that should be sent, to you the following year."
She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard.
Her fingers shaking, as she slowly reached to get the card.

Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note.
Then, as she stared in total silence, this is what he wrote...
"Hello my love, I know it's been a year since I've been gone,
I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome."
"I know it must be lonely, and the pain is very real.
For if it was the other way, I know how I would feel.
The love we shared made everything so beautiful in life.
I loved you more than words can say, you were the perfect wife."
"You were my friend and lover, you fulfilled my every need.
I know it's only been a year, but please try not to grieve.
I want you to be happy, even when you shed your tears.
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years."
"When you get these roses, think of all the happiness,
That we had together, and how both of us were blessed.
I have always loved you and I know I always will.
But, my love, you must go on, you have some living still."
"Please...try to find happiness, while living out your days.
I know it is not easy, but I hope you find some ways.
The roses will come every year, and they will only stop,
When your door's not answered, when the florist stops to knock."
"He will come five times that day, in case you have gone out.
But after his last visit, he will know without a doubt,
To take the roses to the place,
where I've instructed him,
And place the roses where we are together once again."
===================================================================

so shwweet rite??? wah lau... feel lyk cryin ler larz... hai~ ytd me n zer were walking ter the technical blk the filing machine dere... woah... the tears in mwai eyes lyk wan to flow out lyk tad lor... woah... realli veh sad lehz... i dunno wad cum to me... hai~ realli miss dose deys when we played... hai~ realli veh sad... hai~ made me rmb all the ting he had said in the past to hurt me... plus summore is during exam period tad he hurt me... woah tad period of tym was one of the worse daes of my life... but... slowly i gort over the matter... den more tings was done to hurt me again... hai~ took the whole holidae to get over...hai~ den startin of tis yr... everyting start all over again... zer told me lotz of tings.. hai~ dunno whether i shld believe or nort... hai~ he seem to avoid me... i dunno if he is realli avoiding larz... hai` wadeva... i m realli veh tired of following his foot steps... hai~ i wan to ferget him... make him disappear out of my world... hai~ burt unfortunately i carn... i feel myself in a deep hole now...

2005-04-12T18:58:00.000+08:00

i read sumting nice take a look ::::>

a gal asked a guy,
if she wus pretty ;
he said no.
she asked him if he wud wana be wiv her furevr ;
he said no.
she asked him if he liked her ;
he said no.
she then asked him,
if she were to leave, wud he cry ;
and once agn, he replied wiv a no.
she had heard enough.
as she walked away,
tears streamin down here face ;
the boy grabbed her arm and said :yu aint preety; yor beautiful.
i dont wana be wiv yu furevr;
i NEED tu be wiv yu furevr.
i dont LIKE yu;
i LOVE yu.
and i wudnt cry if yu walked away;
i'd die ..
===================================================================
so swweet rite???
another one ===>

LADIES...
Find a guy who calls you beautiful
instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the boy who kisses your forehead,
who wants to show you off to the world
when you are in your sweats,
who holds your hand in front of his friends,
who thinks you're just as pretty without make up on.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you
of how much he cares about youand how lucky he is to have you.
Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."

GUYS...
Find a girl who calls you baby-faced instead of hot or sexi w
who can't stand it when you hang up on her and calls right back,
who would sit there for hours looking into your eyes,
who doesn't care what you look like,
butwhat's inside counts the most,
Who looks at you with the twinkle in her eyes
and kisses you on the cheek instead of the lips,
Wants to be with you in public,
even ifyou wear those old grass stained
and ripped pants with the bleached jersey like always,
Wait for the girl who is a constant reminder of your happiness and joy,
who makes you smile
just by knowing she loves you back.
Wait for the girl whom you give piggy backrides to in public
and she still is in view of her friends,
while she gets off and you hear her go: "you'rethe onefor me, for always"
===================================================================

wunderful dae

2005-04-07T18:41:00.000+08:00

woah... so long since i blogged... haha... well todae was rather tiring... hai~ i played bball 2dae... guess wad... we won RP... 28-04... haha... i noe i m evil larz... haha... well b4 we played... stoopid choon kuat... the ball he passed to me zam me... hmph... wah hit my face... den i bit my lips... but its alrite... haahaa... he was dere playin bball wif the rest... din went to lyk hi or aniting... so bad rite?? burt... hai~ well... GR won IT i tink the score was 20-09...haha... kelvin was damn sad i tink... althou he din show it... MD gals won DL... 10-14... sianz... shern so poor ting... hai~ aniwae... she said her team mates werent cooperating... aniwae... 2dae was SHANG HEN LEI LEI... FG gals got deir feet stepped... face slapped... body slammed... hai~

2dae bryan was so farnie... he actuallie sheltered me frm the sun... when hav he been tad good??? so wierd... well... den its lyk i tink he saw larz... burt... he oso dun seem to care... hai~ stoopid derek... wen we walked out... he purposely use his warm water to spray me... wth... i screamed at him... guess he heard...

me n qin were screaming to support shern... nice a nort... huh??? norman was trying to shoot b4 the match started.. he was so farnie... albert n benji also tried... dey so farnie lorz... hehe... jerome was lyk so pro... hai~ i feel pity fer him... y he din play in inter-class previously... well 2dae he did... glad fer him...

msia

2005-03-22T18:32:00.000+08:00

haha... back frm msia 2 daes ago... sian...so fast muz go sch ler... hai~ but it was damn farn larz... get to play snooker @ a pub @ AWANA RESORT... cool rite??? haha... got shuai ge sum more... haha... nice... well.. i m so damn stress up... so much hmwrk to do... yet i din finish a single one... help... tml gort physics test sum more... hai~ arhhhh.... juz now gort inter class basketball match... den its lyk... dam tiring... so long neva play ler... hai~... burt... i still.. LURVE the sport... haha...cuz... i gort lucky star by me... burt veh marh lu lehz... hai~ i gort once layup den hit the damn rim... woah... den i dribble out... hai~ aniwae... we won... our klass won... 28-12... cool rite??? and erm... karen frm BN... she gort her skin on her foot peel off.. so gross rite??? hai~ shall stop bloggin... gtg to study fer physics test...

a brand new me

2005-03-15T16:26:00.000+08:00

well made a decision to be a brand new me when sch reopens...

haha... well can i?? i hope i can... the brand new me wuld not tok abt him animore... as in nort havin animore hopes... haha... well... it is indeed a tough decision... but... still i hav to do tad... cuz... hai~ den... i wuld luv jesus wif all my mite... spread his luv to ppl... hu r non-believers... shern... r u proud of me??? u muz be rite??? haha...

saturday i went to church... den... pastor jeff... was damn farnie... as usual... well... even thou i din went to pastor ben's service... can tell tad it is borin... imagine... kim, shern... hyper ppl can fall asleep... hehe... no offence...

well... lookin forward to see a brand new me... *cross fingers* i hope... i can...

disappointment

2005-03-06T16:28:00.000+08:00

hai~ since so long i update my bloggie... hai~ so sian... hai~ i was disappointed on my birthdae... m i pathetic??? not a single msg... frm tad ass... nvm... ferget it... guess i m juz wasting my time on him... well... i went out wif a bunch of fwens to cineleisure to watch "a moment to be remembered" to damn nice... wah lau... shern, me, shee ting, wan ting, zer, bryan, chong yeow, kenneth and jiali went to watch... all of us cry except sheeting n bryan... inhuman... haha... no lar... yupp.. worth watching... saw osama n angelina... kenneth ong n ya jun... haha.. n sum other cchms ppl... haha... well... actualli albert n keong got follow us de... burt dey went to meet deir darlings... haha... pearllie gurl n princess... haha... we ate pastamania... tink i will put on weight... hai~ haha...
=====================================================================

althou u hurt me lots of times...
burt i dun hate yuu...
i still luv u...
cuz u hav bring colours into my lifee...
now tad i finallie made a decision...
tad is to giv up on u...
i hope i will be able to achieve my aim...
for i wan to be in the arms of another man...
GOD... the lord... almighty lord....
saviour of my soul...
pls fergiv me if u finallie willing to look back n find me nort behind u....
fer its tiring fer me to be chasing aft yuu n u neva once turn ur head back...
may god bless yuu n ur soul...
may he bring happiness into ur life...
last words to u: good bye
===================================================================

u left me heartbroken...
neva once did u sae sorrie...

2005-02-24T15:58:00.000+08:00

i found sum interestin facts:

THIS IS ONLY FORGIRLS,BOYSDONT READ!
Message:
GIRL TALK

Did you know kissing is healthy
Bananas are good for period pain
Its good to cry
Chicken soup actually makes you feel better
94% of boys would love it if you sent themflowers
Lying is actually unhealthy
Only apply mascara to your top lashes
Its actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you!
Its impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed!
89% of guys want YOU to make the 1st move
Chocolate will make you feel better!
Most boys think its cute when you say the wrong thing.
A good friend never judges.
A good foundation will hide hickeys!..not that u have any
Boys arent worth your tears
We ALL love surprises!!
===================================================================

surprises happen everydae... juz waitin fer miracles to happen...
but when r dey cumin???

===================================================================

Song by yellowcard
entitled: OnLiE oNe

Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only oneI let go,
there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one

Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only oneI let go, there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one
===================================================================

song dedicated to him n fwens

wad's happening

2005-02-22T17:28:00.000+08:00

everyting is juz unpredictable... hai~ i dunno wad's happening.. hai~ i realli dunno wad to do... realli... hai~ y do ppl juz sae thank you?? it isnt the words i wanna hear... hai~ i noe i may b askin too much frm u... but... hav u thot of my feelings? wad happen to dose dae when we played n tease each other? wad happen? i realli miss dose daes... hai~

y do u tink tad wae... dere was onlie u... no one else... y do u tink dere was sum1 else in my heart? when all along dere was onlie u?? wad else do u wan frm me... u rather tok to other ppl den me... its juz so unfair... duznt it worth a try??

tings hav juz gone wierd dese few daes... it isnt the wae i wan tings to work... sum how tings juz get out of hand... hai~ well... tad stoopid helmet ho( ho soo choo) keep kao bei me, wyntrice,suwen n jasmine... wad the hell is rong wif her??? wyn n me juz lyk giggling nia lo... hai~ u noe y??? haha... cuz she put her microfone the loud speaker at her butt... den... wyn sae... it seems lyk her butt is doing the tokin... den she put me n wyn at the back of the klass... hai~ she a damn sucker... how can she do such tings???

ytd god answered my prayers... it came in the form of a dream... it is nort veh clear... the answers are nort written clearly... but i still thanked god fer givin me a clue to my qn...

ambert koo is leavin us.. so sad... haha... hu cares abt him man... yeah... new PE cher... haha... called ms sim... its juz so sad... my physics i got onlie 9/25... pathetic... my klass gort onlie 3 person pass... haha... wen jie... dong bin n qin yi... qin yi scored the highest... 15/25... see the diff... hai~ if i had nort made careless mistake i wuld hav been the highest... 16/25... sadist...

~my heart belonged onlie to u...

===================================================================

love needs NO reason

lady; why du yu lyke mee? why du yu love mee?

man;i carnt tel da reason, burt i relle lyke yu..

lady; yu carnt even tel mee da reason,
hw can yu say yu lyke mee?
how can yu say yu love mee?

man; i relle duno da reason, burt i can prove dhat i love yu.

lady; proof? no! i wan yu tu tel mee da reason.my fren's boyfren can tel her whhyhe loves her, burt nurt yu!

man; OK..OK!!!
erms, bcush yor beautiful,
bcush yor voice ish shweet,
bcush yor caring,
bcush yor loving,
bcush yor thhotful,
bcush of yor smile,
bcush of yor evry movements..

unfortunately,a few dayes latur,
da lady met wiv an accident and went intu a coma.
da guy dhen placed a lettur by her side,
and here ish da content;

Dearest,
bcush of yor shweet voice dhat I love yu;
now can yu talk? no! dherefore i cannot love yu.
bcush of yor care and concern dhat i lyke yu..
now dhat yu carnt show dhem,
therefore i carnt love yu.
bcush of yor smile,
bcush of yor evry movements
dhat i love yu..
now can yu smile?
now can yu move?
no, therefore i carnt love yu..
if love needs a reason,
lyke now, dhere ish no reasonfur mee tu love yu nemore.
du love need a reason?
NO!!!!
therefore, i stil love yu..
and love doesnt need a reason

2005-02-08T19:07:00.000+08:00

wad happen ytd was quite terrible lo... hai~ wish i din hear wad derek sae... hai~ realli... actualli i was damn happi in the morning due to sum msges larz... even Na-Na sae i m veh chirpy tad dae... hai~ i was realli in a veh good mood until.. until.. he told me... told me sum ting tad he said abt me when dey bball... i was devastated... realli... i realli broke my heart into pieces... but i culd tell tis 2 no 1... zer is not by me... shern is not by me... neither is bryan... hai~ i realli dunno wad ter doo.. hai~ i mean if the words were said by sum other ppl... i wuldnt care... i wuldnt even care... but de words cum out frm his mouth... rite frm him... hai~ realli... everyting i hope fer... everyting i thot tad was pleasent fer tad dae was gone... all gone... juz lyk tad... *pop*... i soon have a terrible headache at the back of my head... tis headache din happen cuz of such minor tingy larz... it happened long ago... so its lyk i get used to it ler... it happen at least once a dae... my headache got worse when we had a follow-up... hai~ i dun feel lyk eating de... hai~ den... zer n i went to look fer wan ting... offered her french fries... haha... so nice rite??? den we went down to the canteen... saw de ppl tad i dun wish to see at tad moment.. hai~ zer still wan me to walk over n offer dem french fres.. -_-... den tis idiot councilor frm sec4... wah lau ask me to tuck in my shirt... wth... den the fries drop frm the plastic bag... i tink god duznt wan us to offer dem fries... is destined... den... hai~ cant eat lo... hai~ so sad rite?? dun wan to sae ler larz.. den saw shining n chessia... haha.. chessia was oso veh fed-up with the councilors... hai~ den... shi ning took zer half bitten burger... den... i dun feel lyk eating so i ask zer to gib the burger to shi ning... cuz zer sae she damn hungry... hai~ i in no mood to eat... i went back to class lo... hai~ sad case.. but i was lucky to b in FG... got jokers to cheer me up frm such depressing situation... hai~ special thx to: amos, derek,wenjie,yongyeh... haha... thx guys... u rock...i realli dunno y i muz make myself suffer... y muz i lyk the person tad keep hurtin me... when dere's... hai~ (i dun wan to tok abt tad matter...) hai~ yupp... den at nite i had a tok wif zer... hai~ told her the truth abt him... hu is he n ++... but... i mean... i noe its impossible de lor... hai~ i wish i culd juz fer get him... cuz i realli din get a chance to be happi... realli happi frm inside me... ever since... hai~ now... its gettin worse... hai~ onli he culd help me to ferget the pain temporary... i dunno wad i doin larz... i wish tis isnt the way tings shld happen... pls no...

2dae i wore a skirt to skool... can u believe it... i juz cant... hai~ i feel muai self damn mah lu... stoopid chestnut sae i look lyk a chargin bull... but i was glad my close fwen bryan din suan me... hai~ u noe wad chestnut call jiali??? he call her a chargin pig... so a bull is betta rite??? haha... tryin to an wei zhi ji... bryan ask me y i cover my skirt wif my bag... cuz tis is the onli dae i eva wore a skirt... an outside skirt to skool... hai~ pls lo... i dun lyk myself wearin skirt lo... hai~ cuz shern sae she n zer wearin tade's y i wear... den she n zer bang seh me... shern lim din cum skool... zer din wear skirt... so it juz me n jiali... den i was lyk hidin frm bert, cai,keong,marvin,ryun durin flag raising... hai~ i cant let dem see me in tis idiot skirt... den... when we went into the audi... i actualli sit on the 2nd last row on the right column... den... zer move infront cuz no more space.. she was sitting wif pple she dun realli noe.. haha... she sitting wif grace tan.. u noe hu sitting nxt to grace... amos... haahaa... -_-.. shi jie aka tsunami... dun be angry horz... but the stoppid cher make us move... i was tryin to cover my skirt cuz... the guys r juz in front of me... den me, jiali n sheeting move to shi ting dere... den... stoopid... daryl... sae so loudly... "woah pei yee.. u wear skirt arhz... sexy arh???" wad the hell... xin xin oso ji siao me... hmph dun fwen dem le... den i hush dem... but dey still cont... stoopid pple... hai~ wad de lo... den i quickly sit down... den... the cher move us again... wad de hell... luckily.. de guys oso moved... i was so... relieve... haha... den me jiali n sheeting sat wif the sec 4s... den u noe hu sat near us... javin, rui an dey all... wah dey make alot of noise... den oso veh gao xiao... kai yi n nicola oso(sitting in front of us)... -_-... i tell u javin damn bue hiao bai... wah lau... the Q n A... wahlao.. ppl call him up... den ppl cheer fer him... den he walk n wave n fei wen the ppl leh... wah lau cant stand him... den the whole tingy ended rite??? den i walk out... QUICKLY... haha... dun wan to see de guys... den zer purposely wan hold on to me... refusin to let me go... cuz she wanna show me wearin skirt to the buch of guys... wah lau... luckily i siam quickly... n luckily got sheeting... help me... wah if not i die... den i sae dem cumin den i hid behind the van... i veh pathetic rite??? hai~ wad to do... den derek called me askin where r we usin chong yeow's fone... den... den was on the opposite side of the van... den we saw each other tru the window... wah... derek veh bo liaoz ehz... den.. he was tokin to marvin... wah lao... i siam lyk hell lo... wah lau ehz... den saw marvin n chong yeow n derek leave the skool together...

den bryan call... ask me where are we... stoopid... den we mus wait fer tad stoopid guy... hai~ den... when we reach the bus stop... idiot lehz... u noe hu we saw... derek, marvin n amos(he has no fashion sense.. he is wearin yellow t) on crowded bus 135... 1st person i saw was marvin... den derek... den.. amos... den... amos was standin behind rek... den... its lyk rek was pointin to marvin.. -_-... den... i hid behind zer... woah luckily man... but i tink derek n amos saw my skirt larz... hai~ den me sheeting n zer went to orchard... jiali bang seh... haha... shop until 3 plus...

2005-02-03T19:18:00.000+08:00

todae... we got a chem test goin on... haha... well.. it was quite an easy paper la... amos ask me whether i hav studied fer the test... pls lo... me tis kinda ppl were got study lo... toot ppl hu dunno me... PATHETIC is the word... hehe... scolding amos...haha... farn... cuz he got higher than me in maths worksheet... he, derek n jun hao higher... den keep suanning me... idiots... dum ppl... hai~ wad to do? dey toot wad... haha... amos is such an idiot... he made the 1st column of cabinet drop... den my files mix wif jun hao's... idiot... den he still say he din LIAR... freak him... hate dishonest ppl... haha... well... aft sch..i tutored zer maths sia... haha... den... is lyk i do the questions not her lo... -_-... den went to the soccer court to meet bryan... den see pei zhi,amos, eugene, putput,wenrong,shaun, denis n sum other ppl.. dey playing soccer... den... dey played match larz... den i suan amos... revenge...hahaa.. den... i sae... if he got in 2 goals den i'll call him gor gor fer a dae... den the guys damn de idiot... sae let him shoot... den i sae... hu eva lets him shoot n goal... the person is not a man... haha... den the guys sae... sorrie arh amos... we r man... haha... -_-... den... dey keep cheating me sae last ball... last ball until amos scored a goal... freak... burt... heng arhz... i sae 2 goals... hehe... evil me... hehe... woah...i was shocked... bryan actualli improved tremendously... his skills veh pro... his aiming, shooting and skills all improve sia... i m impressed... din noe he damn pro... den kenneth came n play... he damn lousy... kiat,philip, ze rui, ying zhi, a guy wearing red boxers played... he is disgusting... go arun showing his red boxers... wah lau... jerome came... he lyk skipped sch in the morning... cuz mr soon lookin fer him durin lecture but he nort dere... den we walk out(me, bryan n ken) den is lyk... meet bryan n ken's fwen la... den dey ji siao me... freakin guys... den aft i got onto the bus... guess hu i saw??? cai, marvin, delbert, philip... haha... n sum other ppl... wich i'll nort mention... haha...

aSsEmBlY 2dAe

2005-01-31T18:09:00.000+08:00

early in the morning stoopid shernie called... haha... den its lyk she ask me to roll down.. wad the hell lorz... -_-.. aft breakfast... we walk to the parade sq... den on the wae we sae marvin n his fwen... den stoopid shern go n sae... "hi marvin.." haha... he look n smile... i din noe my da gor gor is dam stoopid... -_-.. larf at juz the word hi... siao guy...

P.E was badminton... n i played wif grace... she is damn pro... pro is the word to describe her...omg man... den play double... choon kuat damn farnie... haha... jun hao n amos played slow motion ball.. haha.. pro rite??

got fellowshippin todae... haha... we ate tuna n bread... haha... so poor ting rite... no larz... its nice... ryun kiat n jonathon converted le... so happi fer dem... chung cheng ppl in y-hope growing le.. yeah... haha... juz being lame...

todae assembly was farn... i was sitting beside wen jie... haha... he keep ji siaoing n suaning me lor... haha... den delbert.. cai n marvin n alvin sat behind me... haha... todae topic is about toilet cleaning competition... lame rite??? den... cai, delbert n marvin keep toking colour jokes... so damn disgusting lorz... yuck... den delbert keep ji siao me... use his wallet, his file to make me... wad the hell larz... i feel myself being watched... den i ask cai and delbert sumthin abt bowlin as wad zer wan me to ask... he sae mayb... haha... zer got xi wang le... haha... i ask bert whether he got water... den stoppid.. he sae he dun hav but marvin hav... wad the hell??? den aft the assembly... i ask bert to msg me aft he n cai decide... den he look at me lo... -_-.. dunno lehz..

while walkin out... derek go n sae... marvin playing eventhou he is bai ka.. haha... i thot "cuz he wana break the other leg"... haha... so wasted he not playing in the b'bois... den cannot help my gor cheer le... nxt yr ba... but still can help my ahma (yong keong) cheer... haha... he sound so old... haha...

2005-01-20T18:55:00.000+08:00

juz read tru my previous bloggs... haha... find myself a bit stoopid... n recalling a bit of the past... hai~ the moments tad i had in the past... sum r so great... i regretted not noticing the bez moments i had at the D n T room... at the file-ling machine... hai~ the time when we applied saw dust on each other... the times we tok n fooled around n played as fwens... a real fwen... now its lyk... i hav missed the chance to do tad again... i hav missed tad... now... i noe its impossible to go back to the past... if i had known tad i lyk him now... i would hav treasured the times we had together... not letting the time pass me by... hai~ but wad can i do now??? i cant do anyting...

how i wished i hav a time turner... to turn back the time... so tad i would treasure the times we had together... my heart ached at the thot of tad... *sigh*...

todae was damn de farnie... haha...in the morning... shern ask me to go find her in her class.. den him in the class doin his work... so hardworkin sia... haha.. in the canteen durin recess... me shern n other ppl were dere larz... haha... me n shernie queued up fer the local noodle... guess hu r dere sitting... cai gang... haha... but i ignored dem larz... haha... den buy liaoz... went to sit at the last row... the desert stall dere... haha... guess hu sit behind me??? AURICK... sick lorz... i wana puke at the sight of him... he is so damn the act seh...

den... cai gang ppl... went to sit in front of the desert stall... den stoopid shern... ask me to look dere... -_-... pls lo... but to sae the truth...i hav turned dere lyk dunno how many times b4 she ask me to look dere... den ask shern to pei me to buy vitasoy... cuz its lyk dey r dere den its lyk damn de gan ga....hai~

den aft sch... haha... so farnie... pok pok(jeng khit) was acting gay... he wan carrying jerene's turtle arund... haha... so farnie... he, si long, wenjie and choon kuat sing song... so damn de farnie lo... haha... si long veh cute cuz he sing twinkle twinkle lil star... act cute... haha... he sing so damn de farnie... haha...

haha... wenjie/shannon/amos hav to confess his luv fer grace tan... cuz she leaving s'pore in feb 16... so we decided to play a trick on her n see her reaction... so farnie...cant wait to see her reaction...juz imagine.. wen jie... bite a rose in his mouth n sae "i luv u" to grace... haha... hhahaa... i cant stop larfing...

den aft sch... me waiting fer bryan at bbal court... den... whiel waiting... zhi hao... colin n a guy(sec 2 dunno his name) haha... dey wanna play match wif jun hao, melvin, a wushu guy, guan jie, kelvin and sum other ppl wich i dunno... woah.. dey wanna play den sae... u all scared lose arhz... coward... so damn de bad lorz... den see yu xin n shern leaving... ken n derek oso... but dey saw me n noe i waiting fer deir pal bryan... dey stayed behind... so cooll.. haha... yup... den me ken n derek borrowed ball frm sec2... den we played... haha... i juz realized i so lan... hai~ veh zhi bei... den we played a match wif 2 sec 2 n yu guang... so sadist all my shots todae is so damn lan... all touch teh rim n roll out... so damn suai... mayb cuz... i dun get his power to shoot... haha... juz jokin...

2005-01-18T18:57:00.000+08:00

todae in the morning... me n xin went up to the fourth level in the old block to look fer sheeting... cuz she haven cum down... actualli oso cuz of erm hmm... yupp... denn... its lyk... saw him in class... doin hmwork larz... haha... " so hardworkin"... muz b nv do his hmwrk... haha... anywae... den went to look fer sheeting... woah deir bio damn de chim lehz... i was tinkin of goin to tad class nxt yr de lehz... hai~ sianz~

den...went down tad time i saw him still doin his hmwork.. poor ting... haha... anywae... when we went down lerr rite... stoopid JEROME... sing stoopid I DREAM... so damn high... lyk a spoilt CD PLAYER... cannot stand him... u noe the bus 31 couple is hu a not??? iis J***** n xiao S****... haha... he still sae is sum other ppl... haha... -_-...

den... durin recess... stoopid louisa force me to eat her BANANA MUFFIN... Y-U-C-K!!! woah... den i sae rongly... den derek heard.. u noe wad i sae??? i dun eat marvin in my life... wad de hell... pls lorz... it cuz of sum stoopid ppl lyk yong keong n derek den i sae wrong one lorz... cant stand it...Y-U-C-K!!!

at the canteen guess wad... we saw cai gang... n other ppl... woah lau... freak man... den... i tink dey ji siao... den he look away... stoopid louisa wan to eat local... wad de... cuz... local is queuing in front of him... wad de... i den dun wan... go dere... let dem ji siao... the onli word i culd tink is "PATHETIC"!!! den... i went to look fer sheeting at the wok noodles... haha... den... we went to sit down...

den... haahaa... aft sch stayed back awhile cuz waiting fer zer to finish her hmwrk... n her daddie is fetchin... sian... den derek was oso dere... den i saw terrence... jun hao... kelvin... hhaahhaa... den i borrowed deir bball to plae... cuz dey hav one n dey r playin match... woah... is lyk... i touch the ball.. de ball gav me a incredible feelin... lyk the world of bball came back alive in me... in my hands... woah de feelin was not words cuz realli describe... i found out tad my passion fer basketball is still dere... cuz i loss it since i quit bball mid of last yr... due to sum ppl n the coach...
the fire of the basketball still burn in me...

my world contains:
1) God!!
2) Him...
3) Basketball...
4) my fwens (e.g LOUISA... SHERN... BRYAN... )
5) my family...
6) my fone...
7) soccer..

my wishes:
1) i hope everyting will go well ferr me tiss yrr...
2) wish him n my fwens all the bez...
3) forgive dose hu hav sin against me..
4) pray fer deose in nid...

my msges goin out to:

jesus~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i thank u fer everyting u hav provided me... lord... u hav allwaes been dere fer my
sorrowmy happiness... u saw wad others dun... not even my parents... despite my luv fer
yuu..my parents duu not understand the greatness of havin u in my life... i tank u fer
tad...

him~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i will alwaes pray fer yuu...althou u may not noe how i feel... but yar... u brought lite into
my life... u made my life frm colourless to colourful... u had spice up my life wif happiness
and saddness... u made me realize tings tad i nv had realize b4 noeing yuu... i thank u for
bein in my life... i thank god fer we hav met... u made me luv basketball more than i
used to... althou u r not the reason y i lyk basketball... u showed me tad wif perseverance n
determination u culd reach fer ur goal no matter wad obstacles is in front of u... u hav
enliten me alot of tings althou u dun tok to me... but tru ur actions i see all... u changed
my life completely... till i dunno hu i m now... i still thank u fer everytingg... all the bez...

zer& shernie~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

u hav been great fwens... allwaess dere when i nidded u all... althou u ji siao me lyk hell.. but i will alwaes luv u... muackzz!!!

bryan,yong keong, chong yeow~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

guys pls grow up!!! no lar juz kiddin...well u hav been great since i knew u all... althou u all r veh de crappy... but its fun noeing u...u hav brought laughter into my life...

sheeting n jiali~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
gals u a definitely good fwens of mine... u helped my in my work!! i m grateful...

xinxin n wen yan~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
well... i dun realli understand u two... but i tink the main problem is me... i
wasnt dere at the rite time... i m truly sorrie fer tad... hope u two wuld
fergive me... despite all the trouble and saddness i hav caused...

the ppl i dislyk~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i dun care if u hate me or not... its ur business not mine... u did the same to let
me dislyk u... so u tink u r great i dun tink so... u suck the wae u tink i suck... but
i dun care... cuz its the minority if u tad hate me... it duznt concerns me... u
splurt vulgarity at me... continue... juz cuz u cant stand the competition between
n me on the match duz mean i can stand u... i choose not to scold back now... cuz
i understand wad the meaning of being refined is... u dunt... i hav learnt tis... cuz
i luv jesus the wae u dunt... he made me realize wad i did in the past was
wrong... my words i used to shout back at u... for tis i sae i m sorry... howeva... i
still thank god fer u... cuz u made me realize me luv fer him god... jesus...

the rest~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
we been tru thick n thin tru de years we spent together... regardless pri sch... or MD
ppl... or sch mates... i appreciate everyting... i thank u fer being in my life... gettin to
noe u all r great...

(^^.)basketball rulz my life (^.^)

terriibly happi...

2005-01-14T18:50:00.000+08:00

muahaha... i m terribly happi... arh... i wanna scream... hhaa... i tink onli shern wuld understand my feelings... yup...

todae... in the canteen durin recess,,, i saw him n his gang larz... haha... den its lyk at 1st i din see him de.. den aft i bought my curry puff... den i saw him... haha... den i quickly walk away... den aft tad we sit at shern dere... me n zer... den zer wanna get a drink(vendin machine) den we went.. aft buyin... stoopid zer... dun dare to walk along the benches... near him...haha... hum ji... den its lyk she bang seh me lar... so i no choice hav to walk wif her... sianz... haha... den aft i sat down.. stoopid zer... realized tad she hav no straw... -_-... den.. she dun wan to get frm the desert stall cuz cai n gang were sitting dere... haha... den ji siao her... haha... askin her why is she avoiding... tink she cant hear... but... del n cai can larz... haha.. actualli i m tokin abt cai de... but shern sae..." zer delbert lehz???" haha... den her face red.. she lyk angry.. haha.. cuz she dun wan cai to noe abt bert.. haha.. too bad...den stoopid zer, shern n bryan ji siao me arhz... huh... stoopid... shern n zer go n sae... hi marvin... yeezi sae hi...-_-

todae aft sch.. while we r walkin to the canteen... we saw marvin n zhi hao dey all.. haha... den u noe wad shern sae??? "marvin... yeezi sae hi..." i m veh DIAOZ... its lyk seh diao... den u noe wad marvin did... he hit shern in her head... haha... retibution...haha...

todae... me n shernie stayed back aft sch to do hm work aft the SWAT lecture... haha.. u noe wad the cher sae... we muz decorate the toilet... lame rite??? haha... den so farnie...

ya... den aft the lecture... me n shern do our work at the concourse... haha... den st john ppl paper flew into the lake.. haha... den i told shern abt wad bert sae the other dae... shern larf... stoopid... hmph... dun fwen her... den she sae.. haha... marvin was smiling so brilliantly... when she sae... i said hi to him...-_-... hhaahhaa... stoppid the tree where we were sitting block my view of the boi's bball court... IDIOT... but i saw him play.. wah lau... his 3 pointer damn de zhun... shiit him... hmph...

aft work... we went to walk... so we walk to the bball court... haha... when i was standing dere he was not playing... haa... but i sae yong keong... rui an... jun cheng... zhi hao... osama... n sec1s... haha... keong is so lac...

den... aft drinkin the water cooler at the cca blk... we watch the guys play... idiot... the jiao lian sae the guy look at me n shern...-_-.. den all the rest of the guys look at us... den we quickly walk away...

den... aft their training me n shern went to sit at the bbal court... den stoopid shernn...s tart the hi tingy again... shern keep sae he was smiling -_-

see.. tad's y i m so happi... smile!!!

2005-01-13T17:42:00.000+08:00

hai~ ytd zer came to my hse... den aft tad when she wanna go hm... she call bert tinkin tad sumting happen to veggie.. den... aft she call... bert sae nth happen... den zer told him i m wif zer... den u noe wad bert sae??? he sae... ytd when he told him (u noe hu) my new hp no... he immediately get paper n pen to rite down the no... i dun realli believe him larz... although he sae he din lie...

but... i mean its a bit wierd larz... tis type of ting happen veh farnie lehz... i mean he could probably rite n den throw it away... BUT he hav hp wad so y do he hav to rite on a piece of paper??? so the most probable reason would be... he wanna rite it fer sum1... so... i tink it was no him hu wan the no... hai~ its a sad ting larz... cuz i tink of tis stoopid reason juz aft i reached home... aft sch... me n zer went to the old block to wait fer ting n jiali... den... stoopid zer ask me to walk along the corridor(DL to HM)... den... hai~ i din see him lar... i onli saw del n alvin... n shern... n roger... terrrence... ryun kiat... haha... sianz rite... actualli is i choose not to look de larz...

den jiali n sheeting walk the same corridor again... wah lau... its lyk i purposely walk dere one lehz... zer din walk wif us the second time... cuz she was SCARED... -_-... hai~

i juz tink wad bert tell me is unbelieveable larz... hai~ u culd sae i m dum cuz i chose not to believe.. but if i believe n the ting duz not coincides wif wad i tink... i m goin to feel terrible... so i choose not to believe... mayb tis wae i will feel beta...

2005-01-12T18:15:00.000+08:00

ddese few daes lyk hai~.. yong keong n bryan n wen yan n wei keong saw the letter i rote to zer.. den its lyk... omg... dey saw every ting...den yk n bryan keep teasing me... sian... hai~ hai~ dun feel lyk riting le... sianz...

2005-01-05T19:27:00.000+08:00

hai~ todae so sian... chessia kept followin zer... haha... happy dae... zer spread rumours again... me n derek... woah.. CANNOT be de lorz... i hav no feelins fer him... not at all... my hart allreaddiee b-long 2 god... n him... but no use de lar... hai~ todae saw him play bball aft sch... me n shern call zhi hao name saeing his jersey(gold in colour) sux... den he(marvin) look at us... haha... todae lit was farn... haha... MS ADRI... she rox man... haha... my locker no. will be 536...
-_-... sian... pa up 10 buck fer it...

2005-01-04T17:32:00.000+08:00

a new year... a new start... well todae is the second dae of sec 3... relatively slow... but on the whole ok larz... but i miss 2 md 04...sniff sniff... hai~ todae.. shern n zer damn de ji siao... at the concourse... dey saw marvin... dey lyk see sum idol lyk tad... wah lau keep calling his name... siao... den dey look at me... wth??? den veh gan ga... i nv go look at him... so farnie lorz... den zer went hm... hai~ den.. she called me n wan me to ask marvin y cai din cum ytd... -_- den i ask shern to listen... hai~ should hav ask him rite??? straightaway ask... miss the chance le... hai~ dunno lehz... sniff sniff... haha... wah i tell u... now i noe y zer sae derek veh irriataing... woah... veh fan lehz... hai~ i so damn SUAI... he sit beside me... i wan to beng liaoz... y is it not marvin.. haha... JOKIN... srhz.. i regret going into FG... woah i wan to go mad le... HELP... SOS....

fustrated

2004-12-27T16:56:00.000+08:00

it is so fustrating... y do ppl hav ter get the same fone as wad i wan... hmph... shern got k700i... my cuzin got k700i... wah... liddat veh sian lehz... how? hai~ dunno lar... sian sia... well i went to hav swensens wif my cuzin on x'mas dae... haha... we ordered ice-cream... haha... its juz so yummy... mmmm... den aft tad... we sort of played wif the left over ice-cream... we mixed all the flavours together(abt 15 flavours) den we add salt... separate into 3 dish... den each added chili, tomato sauce and pepper... n we taste dem all... yuck rite? haha.. reminded me of the zhong ji mi mah we played... den we pour the leftovers into the drinking cup... n added water n tissue... den the waitress was larfing while clearing the table... its farnie to see the expression haha...

2004-12-24T16:24:00.000+08:00

You are 67% Pisces

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

x'mas

2004-12-24T16:08:00.000+08:00

well... tml is x'mas ler... may b goin 2 city harvest wif cuzin... hai~ another yr pass juz lyk tad... haha... so fast... sorta miss every ting tis yr... haha... tis yr is veh fun but at the saem time veh depressin... haha... dunno lar... diff frm sec 1... time realli flies... nxt yr celebrating 15 yrs on earth... haha... is lyk the sec 1 orientation was juz ytd... so fast sec 3 ler... hai~ everyting tis yr is gona be hist.. gona be in my memory... todae my dad sae he is gona get me a new fone... haha... considering k700i and e800c haha... good rite?? (r u jealous louisa???) tis is my x'mas present... i tink so... haha... my bro got himself shoes for x'mas... haha... well... juz hope every wish will cum tru the following yr... haha...

2004-12-14T18:52:00.000+08:00

[[I Dream]]
In my mind
I can climb
All the mountains that surround me
The spirit there?
Where eagles dare to fly

In my heart
There's a spark
That can light the world around me
An open door
Where i am sure dreams are

Doesn't matter if i win
Or the colour of my skin
Cause the race is all about
Believing in yourself

And i dream
I can run
Like the wind
And be strong
When my heart
Just wants to give in~

And i dream
I can be
The hero thats in me
When i dream
I dream

Theres a time
In your life
When the odds
are so against you
There's no defeat
If all you keep is pride

First or las
tSlow or fast
There's a dignity that makes you
Keep driving on
When worlds have come apart

Doesn't matter rich or poor
Or the things you've done before
Cause the race is all about
Believing in yourself

And i dream
I can run
Like the wind
And be strong
When my heart
Just wants to give in

And i dream
I can be
The hero thats in me
When i dream

I dream
Of the moment
That forever will be golden

When the torches
your dreams will last
That are shared by everyone

I dream
I can run
Like the wind
And be strong
When my heart just wants to give in

I dream
I can be
The hero thats in me
And i dream
I dream
(I dream of you...)
===================================================================
hai~ so fast its gona b x'mas le... hai~ time realli flies... hai~ i xiang tong le... hai~ wad's meant to b is meant to be... haha... i dun care abt him le... i regretted goin to FG... hai~ all the guys dere r toot toot 1... hai~ DL got jeffery n chen cheng n shern dey all... hai~ nvm lar... anywae my hist is lyk kana sai one... hai~ well... last saturdae... while i was on the wae back... a shuai guy in white is so farnie.. he stood up to offer his seat to a lady but she din wanna sit.. den he sat down again... den an old ah ma came n stood in front of me... i offer her my seat... den tad guy saw... he stood up again... hai~ guess he is guilty... haha.. tis cumin sat i m goin to a guitar concert... haha... maybe takin up guitar... well...

BoR3d..

2004-12-06T13:40:00.000+08:00

for the past few weeks... i hav been sitting on the sofa watching tv... ROTTING... wad a holidae... althou i was out on the weekends... n weekdaes... but... singapore so small.. so sian... nowhere to go...hai~ me hav e been to most of the shopping malls ler... hai~ orchard walk until damn sin... hai~ me... watching MVP valentine AGAIN on channel U... hai~ sianz... den Mars.. but the rest damn de sian... hai~ wad to do.. holidae lehz.. parents nag n nag n nag.. but for the previous week n the week before... i keep seeing jeff wang... but... i din walk up to him to get his signature... cuz he was shooting sum dum show... haha... sianz... for the holidae... i hav watched... polar express... incredibles... princess diaries... mayb without a paddle soon???

2004-12-02T15:24:00.000+08:00

hai~ althou... sly din win the singapore idol showdown ytd... but.. he is my idol no matter wad... haha... he sang the i dream woah damn nice... nicer den taufik lo... haha... but taufik is fit to be in the world idol... cuz sly's ah beng image will malu us... haha... sly sang... bon jovi's it's my life... i dream... an jing... taufik sang... suspicion... i dream... me and mrs jones... haha... taufik's vioce is damn power... so nice... n soothing... haha... got his fans... wear white dress... n rite on the placards to sae dey wan marry him... haha... farnie rite... haha...

haha..

2004-11-30T19:18:00.000+08:00

hai~ todae watched a drama serial... hai~ touch by tis lines... ren sheng you liang zhong rang ren yi bei zhi tong ku de yi han... 1) bu neng de dao zhi ji xin ai de ren... 2) bu neng kan dao zhi ji xin ai de ren de dao xing fu... hai~ wei shen me yao gei wo ting dao zhe ji ju hua??? y? hai~ de show so touchy... woah... well... not as touchy as zhan shen... ei... tad louisa... took my pants... my pencil... when r u returning me? haha.. kiddin...

Saturdae out...

2004-11-29T17:14:00.000+08:00

haha... i was out the whole dae on saturdae... yesh... at east coast... haha... cycling... nice... haha... i saw JEFF WANG... he is so damn shuai... he is tall...his hair is cool... haha... my fwens n i stared at him... haha... den he smiled at us... cool guy... we oso saw xu qi... mark lee... n huang hui... haha... dey r filming the show... you hua hao hao shuo... cool rite? we were sitting at the table in mac drinkin... den stoopid... xu qi point at us... den jeff wang was oso dere... den my fwen thot sumting was rong... haha... den the crew came in... den we all siam... haha... den... xu qi... was surprised at the speed we "disappeared"... haahaa... too bad... anywae... it was wae too cool... den we went to Parkwae... bought 5 bottles of VODKA... haha... tad dae... i drank 1 bottle of vodka... one bottle of JAP wine... haha... den sundae... went to east coast again to swim... haahaa... saw SHUAI ge... woah damn shuai sia... haha... den got one ah bei... haha.. he swim until far out into the ocean... damn pro... i saw GOLDEN RETRIEVER oso... woah damn cute... i realli hope to hav one... in the future...

hai~ me alone... onli gurl frm md in 3fg... sian... hai~ zer not approve... stoopid shern go appeal for DL... nv tell me earlier... den i dun appeal... hmph... i hate her... i m still lookin fer Singapore indoor tickets... hope to get one...

2004-11-24T15:31:00.000+08:00

nice rite?? he is damn cute... haha...

well... ppl out dere r dere to ruin him... hai~ news abt his mum... hai~ if he has the talent... y muz ppl sway towards rumours??? we shld support him for hu he is n wad he will be... Sylvester rox... i realli hope i can go to S'pore indoor to watch him perform... luv him lotz... hai~

dunno wad to sae

2004-11-19T19:11:00.000+08:00

i dunno wad to sae... hai~ my mind was fill wif him... hai~ mayb watching the incredibles tml... haha... last week watch evening show... until 8 plus den go hm... haha... nice rite??? but i was hoping tad the person accompanying me is him... hai~ tink i'll make it short... sad case... wad to do??? k larz... nth much to sae abt... all in my mind... had to turn dem into words....
=====================================================================

i hate myself

2004-11-17T19:19:00.000+08:00

i realli hate myself... hai~ y muz i be born onto tis world... into tis family... i dunno... y muz i be me?? y... i did no wrong... n my dad ask me to FUCK OFF... wad is rong... m i no human to him... m i not his daughter??? y muz i be the ting for him to vent his anger... when can i eva get to leave tis house...................... when can i... when can i... hai~ y muz god do tis to me... let me into tis world to suffer... no matter in terms of family or fwens or him... dem... y??? y dun juz let me die when i had operations when i was young... y let me cont to lead tis life... y??? muz it be alwaes me??? y muz dey push all teh fault towards me??? my dad... my mum... my brother... hai~ i dunno... ferget it... anywae... my life.. my whole life is useless... y dun let me die when the car cums... i m willing to die to exchange for the lives of others... i realli dun wan to live on the earth to suffer... let me be the donor of organs to dose hu need dem to survive... i hate myself...
=====================================================================
ytd i saw olinda at wisma atria... outside isetan... i tok to her... shook her hands... she look at me as if i m her younger version of her... haha... do i have the zi ge... haha... aft meeting her... i hav a urge to meet sylvester... i relle look forward to meet him... haha...
====================================================================
i hope todae's last episode of ren wo ao you jing wen is wif kai wei... rmbering wild wild wet... hai~ i was hoping to have a guy fwen lyk kai wei... not asking more juz fwen... haha... but i noe i not so lucky....

buffet???

2004-11-16T10:52:00.000+08:00

[nothing's gonna change my love for you]

If I had to live my life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long
With you I see forever oh so clearly
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong
Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you
CHORUS:
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You ought to know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you
If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead a way for us
Like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are
So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you
CHORUS
===================================================================
ytd went to eat buffet.... haha... den beside me are all shuai ger... haha... zer jealous not??? all of dem except one fat guy larz... realli.... one of dem was SITTING nxt to me... haha... he so cool lorz... wearing a cap... juz lyk jay chou... haha... so shuai.... woah... tell u dey veh kong bu... dey eat n eat n eat... woah lyk sum siao ppl... b4 i start eating dey were alr dere eating... aft i finish dey still haven finish... haha... well the buffet was veh nice... haha... realli... u noe dere is tis wine glass for drinking... den i played wif it... i made a sound by rubbing the mouth of the cup... so nice... so pro rite??? haahaa... den sat evening went out to watch princess diary 2... veh romantic sia... haha... miya n nicholas were slping under a tree tru-out de nite... so lang man... hai~ made me thot of him... for the past few daes... i hav been tinking... did i do the rite ting??? muz i ferget him... cuz i realli dunno... rmb taddae when i went to sch to appeal... den dere is bball training... den my dad drove past... i was actualli finding fer him.... hai~ but i culdnt see him... i dunno wad to do u noe... help...

erm...

2004-11-04T20:20:00.001+08:00

todae early in the morning rek msg me at 10 plus to thank me fer giving him present... hai~ den i joke tad... my present to small larz... sheeting will buy him a bigger and beta one... he din tok abt it... den we tok abt me wanting to appeal into his klass... den i thot mayb not larz... he ask y? u hav nth to lose... appeal arhz... its realli worth a try... he gave me al types of encouragement... den daryl told me tad he is a erm... u noe... yup... he oso want me to try going into FG... well... i dunno... den tok wif alvin... den ask tings abt appealing... den i msg rek cuz he tml going to maths test... i ask him to help me take the form... den he sae he'll pass to me tml evening... but he dint... den he called to apologise... sae he got track... yup tad's all